Christmas, but the cookies look so good....

Yes, Christmas time is here again. Time for family, friends, maxing out the credit card, and a huge amount of goodies just begging to be eaten. How do you get through without having to moving up one wardrobe size? Since hCG and subsequently going Paleo, I tend to lose on those holiday feast days. Thanksgiving gave me a 2 lb. loss. How? Easy, I don't partake in anything that has grain. Yes, that means I miss out on the Stove Top stuffing, biscuits, the pie, the cookies, and the like. It doesn't mean that I don't get to eat, enjoy my family, or have a treat. It means that I do my best to choose wisely. My Thanksgiving plate had turkey, mashed red potatoes, honey glazed sweet potatoes, and southern style green beans (green beans, bacon, onions, and lots of butter). I even had some cranberry sauce (which did have HFCS, yecch). Our Christmas dinner this year will be Tri-tip, baked red potatoes, steamed broccoli, salad, and for the family, gravy, rolls and apple pie. Does this sound like I am denying anyone a grand Christmas feast? No, of course not. Am I anywhere near depriving myself? No, not even close. For me, Christmas is family coming together to celebrate the birth of the Christ. It's about loving and giving. It's not about cookies, cakes, or any other food, healthy or otherwise. I hope everyone has a happy Christmas. May God bless you all so that the best of your past will be the worst of your future.

Back to the Drawing Board

Hello all! I have been lax on my postings, mainly because I am being lazy and flighty. I did not manage to come through the Thanksgiving season unscathed. In fact, I find myself 30 lbs. over my best weight of 191. I am still down 100 lbs., and have no desire to gain and lose THOSE pounds again. My biggest problem is not sticking to a stricter Paleo eating plan. I have been far cozy with sugary stuff. Mainly dark chocolate. I am still very careful that it contains no soy or dairy, but candy is candy. I have been researching Paleo meals that I will be terrorizing the whole family with. Everyone has been eating bread, pasta, cakes, cookies (not me...but I am letting the Littles and not being a good Mommy). Not to mention all the processed meat products. So, starting Jan. 1 we will be having wonderful Paleo stuff, with some minor addendums (my hubby has to eat on the road, so lettuce wrapped sandwiches are a no-go). I will be focusing on homemade meals, prepping and freezing, and the odd Paleo snacky. My poor children will be stuck eating healthy meals and snacks (awwww poor babies...). I just whipped up a batch of Paleo mayo which came out well with an immersion blender, my preferred way of making mayo without using the "slowly, slowly, slowly, slowly, add the oil, drop by drop, slowly, slowly" method, which is time consuming and well, frankly, sucks. Take your favorite mayo recipe, put it all the ingredients into your jar of choice (I use 1 quart mason-type jars, my stick blender barely fits in it...), then put in your immersion blender, set it on the bottom of the container and let it whirl until the emulsification process starts (you will see the eggs and oil start looking solid, like mayo), then you can start the up and down movements to blend in the rest of the oil. Here's a tip to make sure you get good mayo, all the ingredients should be a room temperature. Once you put all the ingredients into the container, let them sit together for a few minutes so that everything is at the same temp. I am not promising perfect mayo every time, but definitely most of the time (sometimes you just get oily scrambled eggs, yecch...). I am starting my strict Paleo plan now, and will keep everyone posted on how things are going. If sticking Paleo shows me some good results, then I may just strict Paleo my way back down, if not, I am contemplating doing hCG again in February. Well, I am off to start some meatloaf (an old family recipe that improved by being converted to Paleo!).

Naughty, naughty me

I would love to post about being in One-derland, or being a comfortable size 14, but, alas, this is not the case. My naughtiness took the form of black forest bacon (which has plenty of sugar and corn), sausage links, and far too many sunflower seeds. Did I happen to mention chocolate? Yep, my (and many others down fall) sweet tooth was going for broke. I have been indulging in Theo's dark chocolate (almond and sea salt), and Heavenly Organics mint patties. I really tried to stretch them out, but still ended up scarfing up way too much junk. I made the choice, and I paid the price. Right now, I am making plans to be prepped for a zombie invasion paleo style. I will be storing some grains (rice) and some legumes (beans, usually pinto), but I am also planning on canning some meat (when I find good deals, I stock up), making some jerky, and getting the veggie garden going in the spring. Being prepared for whatever the future holds is important, especially since I have kids, a husband, and an elderly FIL to care for. Just because it's the end of the world as we know it (TEOTWAWKI) doesn't mean that we still can't eat healthy. You will hear about having to have tons of carbs (in the form of grains) to maintain your physical activities. This is not true. Looking back through time, Noah didn't step off the Ark and have pasta. He had to start his garden, not only for himself, but for 7 other people. But, Noah and his family did have to continue to eat what they had left in the stores of the Ark, and I bet you that Noah's sons went hunting (God made the animals afraid of people once they landed), for some fresh MEAT. The only thing that holds us back from being able to live off the land is knowledge. NEWS ALERT: Information is available at your local library, and it's FREE!!!! Everyone can have a garden of one sort or another, some will be HUGE, others as small as their balcony. If you don't have a garden, start one, if you don't know how, learn. Can you hunt? Learn. Skin an animal, learn. Just remember, when it comes to hunting, use the animal nose to tail. So, along with my health, these thoughts are consuming me. I don't want to rely on bread, crackers, and pasta to keep going, even in the event of a disaster. Prepping also includes getting more physically fit. I can hold my own body weight for a few seconds (about 20) while hanging from a bar, but still can't pull my body up. My upper body strength is pathetic. I can do 15 push ups (real ones, not girly ones), and hold a plank for a minute (with enough arm shaking to start an earthquake). I really need to practice running sprints. My leg strength is pretty good, I can lunge and deep knee bend with the best (of course, having legs used to holding up 300 + pounds, then losing 100 of those makes it a bit easier), but although I can run, I can't go too long (still too much jiggles on me), and in an emergency, I need to be able to haul ass possibly carrying two 40 lbs. kids. On the horizon, we have a Disney trip planned in February, and Disneyland is very similar to a Zombie invasion, and the same amount of strength and determination to survive will be needed. Do you find yourself wondering about this kind of stuff? Steps must be taken, and there is no time like the present. Whether you are planning for the Apocalypse or a family vacation, health and strength are vital!

Making a plan

Over this past month, I have been being my old self (and not the good one) again. Still Paleo of course, but also just hanging around on the fringes. Over the past 5 days, I have adjusted my diet, eating mainly Pounds and Inches approved foods, but definitely more than 500 calories per day. I stick to the same eating program with meals at lunchtime (usually around 11 ish) and having dinner in and around 5 pm. I mainly eat separate from the family. I have been having either strawberries, oranges or apple twice during the day. Today I have been feeling a bit weak, so I had an orange about 2 hours before lunch, and an apple 2 hours after lunch, and I will make my dinner when I start feeling hungry. I think I have been indulging in too much coffee and not enough water. So far, I have been losing well, starting at 215 5 days ago, and standing at 206 today. My scale is showing me that my fat percentage is going down. Yes, that's 9 pounds, which can be argued as water loss, except for my scale again, which shows my water percentage going up. If my losses maintain, I will be in One-derland again by next week, which is also my 10th wedding anniversary. Last night my hubby and I went shoe shopping for some heels for me. I tried those popular platform heels, which, much to the relief of everyone at the store, didn't make me fall over. They were cute, they put me well over 6' tall (my hubby is 5'4"), but they weren't comfortable to wear for any length of time. Heeled, girly shoes were never anything I ever thought about getting, mainly because at 300 + lbs, I was afraid of snapping a heel and falling. Not to mention, putting that much weight on to my toes, just wasn't happening. Now, with more than 120 lbs gone, I don't mind a two or three inch heel, and can wear them for a while before my feet start to hurt. So, next Saturday, I will dress up in my sequined burgundy dress, my sparkly 3 inch heels, and the hubby and I will go out on the town. Who knows, we might end up at the batting cages again (my choice of fun, not his). It would be interesting to see if I can bat in heels. Weight loss is funny. While you are losing weight, the days seem so slow, and once the weight is gone, you realize that it went by so fast. Everything is perspective. Although I am not much into the new age-y crap, there is something to be said for being positive and visualizing an outcome. For me, it's clothes and (suddenly) shoes. I will hit the thrift store and buy stuff that fits, and stuff that will fit, usually one size smaller than my current size (which is a 16 right now). I have some small 16s and a few 14s to see me through for now, but am looking forward to my next trip to the thrift store (hopefully soon). Anyway, if you whine and cry about what you are missing, you are just sabotaging yourself. Yes, most people will agree that cake, candy and cookies are delicious. I love ice cream, and bacon (together or separate), and my homemade mayo. But, right now, the cost to lose nearly 10 lbs in 5 days are the goodies I overindulged in to pick up the 20 + pounds. Everything has a price. Stay positive and focused, and before you know it, you will have reach that first mini goal. Whether it's 2 pounds or 200 pounds, it will go. Not all at once, of course, but eventually. Again, stay positive, stay focused.

Gotta look at the Big Picture

Good morning Friend. The BIG PICTURE. In business we hear this a lot. In personal lives it's the same. We don't make a budget on just one bill, so how can we look at anything else that way? One single human being is a giant picture. Not only is there are physical health, but our mental health, emotional health, and even our spiritual health. Each of these components are also a Big Picture unto themselves. And, here's the clincher, all these work together. If you are ill (physical health), and feeling bored (mental health), and crying "why me!?" (spiritual health), and then you might feel sad (emotional health) because you had plans for the day that you can't do, your body is going to have a hard time healing. On the other hand, you wake up feeling good, ready to tackle the day, won the lottery, and just overall having a great time with life (it can happen!), your body will be strong and invigorated and HEALTHY. 1. Make a conscious decision to change. Big or little, giant leap or a small baby step, change an unhealthy habit. Maybe you'll stop soda (this would include diet), or that high calorie coffee drink. Switch to mostly water, unsweetened iced tea, and/or unsweetened, unmilked coffee. Maybe it means taking a walk after dinner. How about skipping the mealtime bread? The important thing is to make a CHOICE. That evil little voice in the back of your head is saying "I can't give up XYZ." "Drink black coffee, eww gross." "But BREAD is the cornerstone of the USDA's recommended daily allowance!" Except for the coffee one, I have said the same exact thing. Remember, I am using the words "DECIDE TO CHANGE", not alter your lifestyle, but CHANGE. Change doesn't come easily, and if you are wishy washy about it, it won't come at all. 2. You are responsible for YOUR choices. As much as I would love to blame the USDA and their stupid food pyramid for my being fat, they didn't force any of the processed crap that I ate down my throat, neither did the advertisers for Dunkin' Donuts, McDonalds, or Little Caesars. Nope, my own choices. No matter how many clubs, bars, or parties your friends invite you to, you don't have to drink or eat anything that you don't want to. YOU CHOOSE FOR YOURSELF. 3. Educate yourself about nutrition. There are TONS of books out there, including the Internet, plenty of information to sift through. I personally choose the materials that had nothing to do with the Standard American Diet (SAD). I have done everything the USDA, the doctors, and even common wisdom (CW) said to do, with little/no results, and when I did get results they were short-lived at best, completely unhealthy at worst. Notable reads: Real Food by Nina Planck The Paleo Solution by Robb Wolf The Paleo Diet by Loren Cordain The Primal Blueprint by Mark Sisson Primal Mind/Primal Body by Nora Gudgaudas Notable Websites: Paleo Non Paleo (www.paleononpaleo.com) The Clothes Make the Girl (www.theclothesmakethegirl.com) Jen's Gone Paleo (www.jensgonepaleo.blogspot.com) The Primal Parent (www.primalparent.com) Those are just a few. The web is bursting with plenty of info on all diets and types of eating. When you do start your research, keep in mind that you aren't "starting a diet", you are CHANGING your eating habits. Find something that you can live with. You will be eating this way for the rest of your life. A quick fix diet hasn't help so far, so why even bother. Instead, put your energy into something that will last. And remember, the more you learn, the more you will adjust the information to fit your life. It's OK, to wander off the path a bit. There is no one diet fits all. I am going to stop here. This is a lot of info to absorb. You have your homework, Friend. This is your life, your health, be obsessive about it for a while. Until next time...

I AM NOT A ROLE MODEL (or am I?)

I have control issues. Those who know me are going, "duh, you just figured that out?" No (smartasses) I did not just figure that out, I have always been this way. Many times being a pseudo-dictator has worked for me. When I worked in security, I had to be in control of any and all situations. As a wife and mother, I have had to tone down my authority. Being 150 lbs. + overweight had me thinking I was in control. I put the tasty food in my mouth, I ate, and ate, and ate. Complete control, right? I had every excuse in the book as to why I was overweight, but it never occurred to me that I had lost all control. I had given my control away. Away to stress, away to sorrow, away to anger, away to boredom. Instead, I allowed food to be in control. My husband has a big mouth (weird segue, right?). In pride, he talks to co-workers, friends, and his clients about my weight loss. When he comes home, he tells me about the people he meets in his daily life, how they are on some crazy new diet. How they have tried everything to lose weight. How much they work out to no avail. He tells me about some of the guys on his forums that are trying new foods, new tricks, new products, to lose those unwanted pounds. Then he tells me how he tells them about me. How I lost the weight. The way I keep it off. How much happier I am. How much better I feel. Turns out that I have a big mouth too. To those who will ask, I tell. The lady at the supermarket who is passing out samples of cereal, or muffins, or peanut butter, listens patiently to me explaining why I don't eat what she is offering, along with a picture of me at around 350 lbs., with a waist measurement of five feet!!!! Then, as I walk away, she will be offering to someone else. That someone who is in a scooter shopping cart, with the cart filled with Weight Watchers entrees, diet soda, and fat free snack cakes. I become so sad. I want to shake them all. I want to pull that man or woman out of the scooter and beg them to stop killing themselves. Please stop killing yourself with a fork. This is a slow death. It is hard to watch. What makes it worse is that the dying individual has every intention of stopping, tomorrow. There seem to be plenty of tomorrows. I know. When I was a teenager, I was immortal, I had all the time in the world to lose weight. Then, as a twenty something, my tomorrows were fulfilled, but only for that short term party, wedding, special vacation. Then the occasion would pass, and tomorrow just wasn't as important. In my 30's I was consumed with work and raising a child. My personal needs had to take a back burner to the needs of my child. I would try the fad of the week diet (it was the New Mayo Clinic diet, kinda like Atkins). Suddenly, I was 40 and 41, with two small children to raise. Then at 44, I learned that my tomorrows were dwindling. I had high blood pressure, and was prescribed medication that I was afraid to take. I had clogged arteries, and was given the Xerox copy of all the (plastic) foods I was to eat. I had sore knees from carting around all that weight. I had strange pains in my chest. My tomorrows were gone. I was actively dying. Every cake, cookie, noodle, rice bowl, candy bar, was just speeding me along to dead. I would be leaving behind my best friend and husband with a huge responsibility, raising two small children and needing to help a grown autistic child. He also has his parents to take care of, they couldn't help with the kids. He would be alone. This recap of what I went through before I lost the weight is for Friend. You know who you are, Friend. Yes you. You, who thought "Wow, that's great! I wish I could drop a hundred pounds, but no diet works." "She's just lucky." "I wish I had that kind of will power." "Whatever, that worked for you, but it won't work for me." Friend, You can lose the weight. You can be healthy. I have no magic, no secret power. The only will I have is to survive. And yes, it's true, what works for me, may not work for you. Together we'll seek out the answers. Together, we will find the right question. Each person has their own question. I don't have all the answers, but I can learn, and if I can learn, so can you, Friend. Will you let me help you, Friend? I am just a person. I am a person who accomplished something great. It wasn't easy, but it wasn't impossible either. I may not be a role model, but I am someone who cares. All I ask is for honesty. We can lie to ourselves, and let our tomorrows run out, or we can be honest and see the dawn of a new day. I will be here, Friend.

Wouldn't it be nice if...

...we could live in the perfect world! In the perfect world, I would be at the ideal (what exactly is ideal?) body weight, and strong enough to compete in a 5 or 10K, or maybe an Ironman, or even know how to ski for a biathlon. Alas, this is not the case. We are having beau coup drama in the house of Rusty. Which is causing mega stress and lots of dissent amongst the family. Between a literally crazy MIL and kids just being kids, a hubby who just wants to chuck it all, and a FIL who just wants to sleep all day, guess who gets to deal with all the cr*p? Yes, your friendly, neighborhood, Paleo-mommy. My only super power seems to be the ability to drink coffee, and find lost shoes under a single bunk bed...not much, but it's what I have to work with. There are only two important things in my life now: My health and my marriage. Yes, health and marriage, and I'll tell you why. If I am not healthy, I can't do jack-diddelly for my family. Without my husband, I would be lost. Please understand, this is not "man dependence", I can certainly support my children on my own, if I had to (I have done the single mom thing, it sucked). But, I don't want to. I was blessed to find the man I want to share my life with, to grow old with (have grown old with...). I haven't looked at another man for 12 years, because the one I have is perfect for me. Hokey, yes, but very true. Last night, we worked on us, today, I start working on me (AGAIN). I weighed in at 212.4, which is 8 lbs. over my LDW (Oct. 2012), so all in all, I am not too far off the mark. Unfortunately, I am 21 lbs. off my best of 191. I would like to get back there again. Do to some financial restrictions, I will not be able to hCG my way down this year, so, I have to "man up" as it were, and do it the old fashioned way. I am so thankful for the Paleo lifestyle. Now to embrace it a bit tighter. Since we don't have the means right now for me to join a Cross Fit box, I am just going to have to improvise with what I have. Maybe I can get some kettle bells for Christmas, but right now I have 200 + lbs. of body weight to work against gravity with. I can hold a plank for one minute, which is good, but I can do better. I can do 6 burpees without stopping, not much, but I can do better. I am going to measure out 400 meters on the bike trail behind my house, and practice sprints (did I ever tell you I HATE running?). All of which I can do for FREE!! Throw in some sit ups, monkey bar climbing, and some area hiking, and I am pretty set. Hopefully, next year, we will have our life-duckies in a row, and I can be fit and ready to ramp up my exercise program at a Cross Fit box (I really want to try it out), or, who knows, maybe write a how-to at home book for other SAHM's like me!

Keeping it up

Day 24 of burpees! I am trying to get as many in in one set as I can. I can get 6 good ones, but then they start getting sloppy. I am thinking about adding in Ashy Bines Bikini Challenge (no, not to get into a bikini!), you can find out more info at www.abbbc.com.au. Right now, I am just focusing on burpees, which is a great core, arm and leg workout, but working on my abs should be a priority too. The challenge is sit ups, crunches, leg raises, and planks, increasing each day (with rest days included). I spoke to my hubby about another round of hCG. Since Oct., I have gone as low as 191, and as high as 208, but I usually remain at my LDW of 204. My theory is that if I hCG to 170-ish, I will maintain there with Paleo eating. If it was possible to subtract my loose skin weight, I would be lighter by about 15 to 20 lbs. My hubby is OK with me going another round, now I just have to come up with the funds. I will be doing Body Shapers again (www.bestlifehcg.com), which have worked so well (125 lbs don't lie!). Off to go figure my budget!

Coming along

Hi all! Today is day 16, and yep, 16 burpees! I am getting very impressed with how strong these are making me. My 16th burpee was almost as good as my first. I did 8 then rested for a couple of minutes (well, made my bed), then did 5 more, then after a 60 second rest, completed the rest. All told, I exercised for about 4 minutes. Everyone knows that I don't put a huge priority on exercise. Diet is my main concern. Contrary to the general belief that it's all about calories in/calories out, it's not. Anyone who has ever done the chronic cardio thing knows that 2 hours on a treadmill, while only eating 1,000 calories, isn't going to slim you down. In fact, the USDA's high carb, low fat, diet isn't helping anyone lose weight. With the big push to eat the standard American diet, America as a whole has only gotten fatter. Low carb diets come and go. Right now it's on an up swing, and those who can are cashing in. That makes it even more important for those of us who want to eat right to read those labels. Once you do, you'll be amazed at the amount of chemicals and corn, are in EVERYTHING! I am having a heck of a time finding BBQ sauce. So read those labels! If the ingredients list is longer than your arm, put it back! Today is a shopping day. I will be going to Sprout's Farmers Market, which is a great place to get Primal/Paleo foods. Other than fruits and veggies, a Sprout's run is only for me. With the family diving head first back into SAD, it makes it very hard to stay on track with Paleo. I do keep a separate supply of food stuffs. I make my own mayo, have my own bottles of ketchup and BBQ sauce (I love condiments), which are made with sugar rather than high fructose corn syrup (HFCS). Since I am the only one who actually cooks, everyone else is compliant with what I cook. I tried out a new recipe I found on (Juli is a wonderful cook and now has a cookbook out, so check it out). It was a Honey Mustard Crunchy Chicken and Plantain salad. What I have come to learn with Paleo cooking, you will use ingredients you've never used before. A plantain is a member of the banana family, but isn't sweet. In fact, it doesn't seem to have much of it's own flavor, but instead absorbs the flavor surrounding it. It has a potato like consistency, and would be a great substitute for potatoes when using as a filler. Lately, I have had a mad craving for all things cake-y. I make sure that I acknowledge my craving, and then set about finding something else, or just ignore it. Something else will usually be some dark chocolate and a fruit (banana or orange). I may do some baking, but it will be Paleo. It's funny, for a group of people like my family, who are so dead set on eating crap, they will scarf my baked goods faster then anything! Off to start the day...

Day 12 and the big 4 6 is tomorrow!

12 days into my 100 burpees in 100 days.  The first 3 burpees I do are pretty good, the rest...well, I do them (sorta).  Tomorrow is day 13, I'll let you know...

Tomorrow is also my birthday.  Nothing special planned, but my eldest son got me flowers (awwwwww, isn't that sweet).  His dad is teaching him that when in doubt, get flowers.  The Colonel got us a new car a couple of weeks ago, so it counts as a birthday present!

Things are going pretty well.  I was hitting the 35% in fat ratio, which is not good.  This morning I was down to 34%, I want to get down some more.  27% would be awesome, but I'll take what I can get.  Now I am just working to 33% (one third seems like a lot, but there was a time I had a 47% body fat, yep, nearly half my weight was fat!). I am hoping that circumstances will allow for me to do another hCG round. I have stabilized well, and other than minor issues, I don't see a problem with doing another round to get to my holy grail weight on 160 to 175. This range would be good for me. All the experts say 148 is ideal, but I am not out to be a twig, just at a healthy (for me) weight. At dinner tonight, my birthday was brought up, and to be cheeky, my father in law said "39 again, and holding", I told him that I don't mind being 46, considering that two years ago, I didn't think I would make it to 46. He asked why. At 44, I 325 + pounds, sore knees from carting around all that weight, being prescribed high blood pressure meds, given a paper with a bunch of fake "heart healthy" foods to choose from to "control my cholesterol. When I asked about "something" to help me with weight loss, I just got the sad, pouty face from my nurse practitioner. I was treated like a lost cause. I felt like a lost cause. I also asked about hCG, and was told that it's a scam. Everyone who has used it just regained the weight. It wouldn't work. I should just eat the USDA heart healthy diet, and I would eventually lose the weight. Really? Because I have eaten "heart healthy" recommended diet for 44 years, and I was as big as a house! Sometimes you have to choose for yourself. I took the plunge. I did hCG, I took the time to research new ways of eating that involved whole foods, I made the choice to stay away from grains, legumes, processed sugar, almost all dairy products. In return, although still overweight, I have maintained my losses for 8 months now. I will never be "skinny", and I don't want to be. I am happy with who I am, another 20 to 40 lbs would be great, but even if I stayed in the 200 lb range, I can live with it. I have said before that I am a rebel. I do what I do, I take the time to learn, I take the easy road when I can, and the hard road if I have to. Barring any unforeseen tumbling episodes on the stairs, I will be alive tomorrow and for many years to come. I don't fear high blood pressure, because I don't have it. I don't fear high cholesterol because mine is normal. I don't fear a heart attack, because I am stronger and in better health now at 46 then I was 10 or even 20 years ago. I will wake up a happy human tomorrow. I will hug and kiss my husband and children. I will thank God for all that I have.

Still getting my s*** together...

Sloppy, sloppy, sloppy!

Wouldn't life be grand if we could stick to a plan?  By gosh, by golly, I am trying to focus, but I am all over the place.  I am not gaining outrageously, but I am not shrinking either.

I am still in my 16's, but my weight has shifted again (I hate that!), and I am fat in all the wrong places, OK, any place of fat sucks, but it's drifting around my middle section, where I don't need any help (thank you very much).

I did start the 100 Burpees in 100 Days (The-100-Day-Burpee-Challenge).  Here's the gist, you do one burpee on day one, then two burpees on day 2, then 3 burpees on day 3, get it?  On and on it goes until day 100 (yep, 100 burpees), there is a caveat, if you miss a day, you have to do the previous days burpees (say you are on day 21, but you missed day 20, then you do the 20 you missed, then the 21 you owe, best advice, don't miss).  You don't have to do them all at one time, once you get to the higher numbers.  If you are at day 80, you can do four sets of 20 (or 8 sets of 10) at different times (7 am, 11 am, 2pm, 8 pm, whatever).

We went to Sprout's Farmer's Market today (on Del Rio Rd., in Sacramento).  Like most "healthy stores" it can be a bit pricey.   But I did find some grass fed ground beef for $4.99/lb, which is a great price, but a sale price.  A clam shell of strawberries for .99 cents!  They also have a great selection of coconut based ice cream, plenty of organic produce, some of the hard to find items (coconut butter, coconut oil, Braggs, gluten-free items), even bulk bins (too pricey for me, but that's me).

My beloved wasn't thrilled with the whole "organic" thing (he thinks it's a crock), and doesn't get the whole "wild caught" thing with the fish (read $$$$$) or the grass fed thing, although he was thrilled to find buffalo (again, $$$$), and we might pick up some kangaroo for grins and giggles (nearly $8/lb), but will indulge me (he is so sweet!). 

I eat almost exclusively apart from the family.  Today, my hubby went to Jimboy's Tacos for lunch, and got something for everyone except me, I just cooked up a steak, had salad and leftover broccoli, so I was cool with it.  The family is seeing some old favorites, tuna helper and spaghetti, and Paleo versions of other favorites like meatloaf and onion rings (thanks to Tammy Credicott and her cookbook Paleo Indulgences for the onion rings, the main reason I bought the book...).  So they aren't suffering, but they aren't eating as healthy as they could, but since I can't seem to stem the flow of crap entering the house, what's a gal to do.  I bend like a reed in the wind...OK, I shut my mouth and keep my opinions to myself (until the old people tell the doctor that they eat "paleo", and I tell them to quit lying!)

So that's the haps for right now.

Confessions (Damn my eyes....)

Sorry gang, I have been naughty about posting.  I would love to say that I have been working diligently and melting away like I was on hCG, but I can't.

I have been staying Paleo, but eating far too much.  As everyone knows, portion control is not my forte. 

Yesterday was a wake up call.  I stepped on the scale and weighed in at 206.6 lbs!  That's 2 lbs over my last drop weight (204.4).  I realized that this has to be nipped in the bud immediately.

I fasted through breakfast, and had steak and cucumber for lunch (dipped in mustard).  Dinner was BBQ chicken and shredded sweet potatoes.  A bit too much starch, but I do have to keep up a decent calorie count.  500 cals a day are fine with hCG, but not without.  And just to make my life a bit more fun, my girly time kicked in. 

I am hoping a few of these added pounds are just water and yuck weight, but still, I have come too far to settle at anything above 200 lbs.  I still have a goal of 185 or less, so I have 20 lbs to lose.  I was hoping to do another round of hCG (it's so easy!), but our finances will not brook that, so back to basics the Paleo way.

Never fear, dear readers, a set back is just that, a set back.  It is so easy to quit and cry "foul", and "it's not fair", but, as you know, I don't do that.  I am responsible for what goes into my mouth.  This gain is on me for making poor decisions, for giving into my cravings and wants, instead of being diligent in my battle o'the bulge.

It happens to us all.  We can throw in the towel, or we can stand our ground, even against ourselves.

Do you want to quit?  Don't.  Stay the course.  If you veer off the path, turn around and get back on it.  Not tomorrow, now.  Don't let bad choices become habit. 

If it was easy, everyone would do it.  It's not easy, but it's worth it.  Totally.

I'm bbbbaaaaccccckkkkk

The move was a huge mess.  I did gain, but not too much (about 10 lbs).  Time to get back on the wagon, and get control before I am too far out of control!

It could have been worse, but thanks to Paleo eating, I am still in my size 16s.  I think that too much fast food, high stress, and far too many "treats (in the form of dark chocolate)" helped with the gains I am seeing.

Starting today, I am cutting all sugars (dark chocolate, honey, dates, high sugary fruits) and nuts (I love's me almonds!), including pseudo Paleo bakes.

Sticking to good proteins and veggies, with portion control, should put me back on the road to good health.

I am also needing to exercise.  You'd think lifting heavy furniture, boxes, and humping stairs 100 times a day, would count, but it doesn't.  So it's back to deep knee bends, sit ups, push ups, and get some running around with the kids.  We invested in a soccer ball, and it turns out that even with my limited knowledge, I am the most knowledgeable about soccer (how scary is that!), so I get to teach the boys how to "dribble" and direct the ball, plus some pointers on the game in general.

Being in a bigger city will make it easier to find organic foods, and a Fresh and Easy is going to open just down the street from me.  I have never heard of it, but will visit another location to see how they are.  They do carry grass fed ground beef at a reasonable price, plus organic fruits and veggies.

Tomorrow I will post with some stats, to get the ball (and accountability) rolling.

Until then!

Popping in to update

We got our house, now it's time to get everything moved.

Stress levels are leveling out toward the middle.  The nice thing in that I am not gaining, although I am eating way too much dark chocolate, but a girl has got to cope somehow.

Staying away from grains has been a real help. 

Moving will commence on Feb. 15th (fun, fun, fun, blah).  One trip.  It's just too far to do "loads".  My husband's company will be supplying trucks and some extra manpower.

Well, back to cleaning carpets.

So here's what's goin' on...

...PPPPPFFFFFFTTTTTT (tongue out and all the spit I can muster!)

All the house hunting duties have fallen on to me alone.  I was told to "go do" and I did.  After finding what I thought was the perfect house for us, was met with silence, and "we'll sees..."

I was told that all this moving and such needed to be done NOW.  So I did.  I have the extraneous stuff packed, got on track for a 5/3 house, and then was told to wait.  Someone else got the house, I wish them the best.

So now, I am being told that everything is moving too fast.  Whenever is good enough.  Seriously? 

OK, but we are are being considered for another house that's 4/2, the last 4/2 in the neighborhood we want, at a price we can afford.  Affordability is necessary, it's more than we pay now, and going to put us in a very grey area. 

Why am I lamenting over all this?  Because I am hugely stressed.  I want to dive face first into a gallon of rocky road, with a side of warm glazed doughnuts, slathered in butter.  That's why.

These are the times we turn to food.  When life is throwing those curve balls.  When life isn't fair.  Always remember Rule #1:  Life is not fair.  It's okay to be stressed for a short time.  What's not okay is to wallow in it.  This is the time to "man up" as it were.  I could spend this time eating until I puke.  Sucking down all the crap food in the house, and then head out to McDonald's a suck down 5 McRibs, with a stop on the way home for 2 Little Caesar's $5 pizzas.  Hello 300 + pounds.

No.  Instead, I vented to my husband.  Looked at the situation logically, and stayed out of the kitchen.  Food isn't going to make the house bigger.  Food isn't going to put any extra money into our bank account (although it will drain it!).  Food doesn't have a great idea to solve the problem.  Eating myself into oblivion isn't going to de-stress me, or even help in facing the problem.

What will help?  Acceptance.  This is the situation.  I must face it head on.  No hiding behind the ice cream, no drowning my sorrows in a Snicker's bar.

We all have battles to face.  Those of us who are fighting the weight loss battle, just have another front for our battle.  Life will throw everything it's got at you.  Stressful situations come in all sorts of forms.  Sick/ailing family and friends, a job loss, a home loss, fears, heartaches, depression, and so many more.  We are warriors.  We face these things with a sword in our hands.  Death before defeat! 

There are always going to be tough situations that we'll have to face.  We must always remember that food is a way to stay healthy (well, healthy foods!), not a friend to turn to in a time of need.  If you are feeling that need to eat, grab a carrot.  If a carrot doesn't sound good, then you aren't hungry, and you don't need to eat.  I know this is much easier said than done.  Cookies, cakes, breads, sweet treats, all seem like they will make things better.  If you are stressing now, imagine what would happen if you went back to old habits, and found yourself 10, 20, 30, or even 50 pound heavier?

I truly believe that where ever God closes a door, He opens a window somewhere else.  I don't want to be too fat to climb through that window. 

For us, this will be a short time problem.  If we get this house, then we'll move.  If we don't, then the search will continue, until we do move, or the company changes it's plans to open a new office.  Either way, I will not beat myself up with food. 

If you are facing a giant, then get your sling.  Stand tall, be brave, and don't give into the call of old habits.  You will be rewarded.

Busy Busy Busy

So much going on!

I was to start Crossfit last Monday, but unfortunately life got in the way.  My beloved Colonel was told that he needed to transfer to Sacramento to open a new office.  So, we are in the process of getting a house and preparing to move. 

I also went into the Whole 30 with good intentions (you know, the foundation of the road to Hell?), but have been a bit loosey goosey about the whole (no pun) thing.  I haven't strayed too far.  In fact, I am still trying to keep up with a healthy breakfast.  Yesterday was scrambled eggs with ham and some fried zucchini (in butter).  I am keeping the healthy greens flowing, the Grocery Outlet has a large box of organic spring lettuces that are really good at $4.99, so that helps with convenience and cost effectiveness.  I just plate up some greens, and throw on a protein.  Top with a homemade dressing (either Ranch or honey mustard).  Dinner is usually a protein and 2 veg, last night was baked chicken, broccoli, and pears (which I don't eat).  The problem with me is the in-between time, I have an orange and sometimes chocolate (dark of course).
So, all in all, I am doing good staying Paleo for the most part.

My weight is OK, at 193 lbs, which is only 8 lbs above goal, but I am having a real hard time getting into those 80's.  I have about 2 weeks until my girly time which means water retention and weight gain.  Hopefully, I won't skirt the 200's like I did last time, since there is no "holiday" excuse to eat in the Paleo fringes.

Paleo-ized foods can be just a damaging as standard foods.  Yeah, there is no grains, or legumes, but that doesn't mean that you would lose, in fact, they are really high in calories.

So many Paleo sites that have recipes focus on "replacements".  I am of the mindset that once in a while, "replacements" are good and tasty (breaded chicken strips, Paleo waffles/pancakes, muffins, biscuits...), but our focus should be on veggies, meat, and fat.  How can you go wrong?  Lots of veggies like salad, broccoli, cauliflower, asparagus (in season, not now), kale and other greens, limited amounts of starchy veg like sweet potatoes and yams.  I've even come to terms with potatoes, once in a while, I will make the family gold potatoes or the like.  White potatoes are scary at best, especially with all the GMOs out there, so I avoid those like the plague.

You don't need fancy-schmancy meals that copy the standards.  Nothing is more American than chicken, salad, and veggies.  The difference is adding the extras that aren't needed, like mashed potatoes and bread.  Whether you are at home cooking, or out and about, you can always find something to eat. 

Since everything is so busy here, I will be posting sporadically, but still posting nevertheless.  Now that we are moving to a new city, I will have a front row seat to see how Paleo living is accepted there.  We did have lunch a popular eatery called Five Guys Burgers and Fries, that was sort of low carb friendly.  You can order a burger or hot dog as a wrap, but they are deep into peanuts and peanut oil.  If you are sensitive/allergic, don't go in, there are peanuts flying everywhere!

Until next time!