I reached 240 today! Yea me! I have passed the 20 lbs lost mark, my first goal is in sight, reaching the 230's (yes 239.9 counts!). My second goal, 10% of my starting body weight (of Round 2), is not far away. That would be a loss of 26 lbs (5.6 to go).
After those, it will be getting to the 20's, then the 10's, then the 0's, then to "one"derland! I would like to be in the solid 190's before I stop, then I will let Paleo and exercise carry me to where my body is naturally comfortable at (I am hoping for the 160's, any less and I will look too thin, as if!).
Diet, in conjunction with exercise, is the best way to lose weight. But, when you are looking at high numbers, a strained body, bad habits, and a broken metabolism, sometimes you need the extra help, and cannot just rely on conventional wisdom (CW), which is not One Size Fits All.
Too many times I hear from so many about all the things they can't give up. The "I can live without..." excuses. From thin to fat and everyone in between. I have nothing against a "treat" every now and then, but to drink soda (diet or otherwise) everyday, by the litres? Why?
Maybe it's time for America to really take a good, long, hard look at what we are calling "food". I have nothing against Capitalism, in fact, I am all for it! My beef is with people who won't be responsible for their choices. I will be the first to admit that I didn't make good choices. I would eat 2 Big Macs (and fries and a super sized soda) and be hungry for an apple pie (or 2). I could eat a whole Little Caesar's Pizza, all by myself, and have bread sticks on top of that (soaked in Ranch Dressing of course). BAD CHOICES. Not McDonald's. Not Little Caesar's. Me.
The lesson is in the learning. I had to learn all about food. What makes it good, what makes it bad. There is such at thing as "too much of a good thing".
There is an Obesity Epidemic in America. Not because of bad food (which there is plenty of), but because of bad choices. Bad choices are the result of people remaining ignorant. I know it is cute to do your best Forrest Gump and say "stupid is as stupid does", but it's not stupidity, it's something more deadly, ignorance. Keeping yourself ignorant is a choice, too. Life is about learning, whether you are smart or stupid, there is no reason to not continue to learn. If you are obese, you need to learn what you are doing wrong. If it's medication making you fat, get off the meds (losing weight will help!). If you are diabetic, your food is killing you, piece by piece (toes, feet, lower leg, upper leg, eventually dead). Don't eat the "Diabetic Associations" approved food. The "slow release carb" drinks aren't doing you any favors. How about getting rid of the grains and sugar? Make it a trade, lose the grains and sugars and keep your feet.
OK, off my soapbox. Now that I am on the road to health, I can't help but see all those who are living in ignorance. Riding around in the grocery stores in those electric carts (because they are obese and it hurts to walk), loaded with diet soda, frozen pizza, loaves of bread (whole wheat, so it's healthy, right? Wrong!), chips, 100-calorie packs, and lo-cal microwave frozen dinners. Is it working? Or, are they heavier now then before?
I have chosen. I may not be choosing perfectly, but I am choosing better.
Everyone has choices, what will they choose?
Friday, June 29, 2012
Sunday, June 24, 2012
A Whoosh On a Skip Day
I woke up to a 2.2 lb loss. Very exciting! Yesterday I had my well deserved (and needed) throne time. Which, I am sure, really helped this mornings losses.
The greatest part of yesterday was me putting on my size 22 jeans and finding them way too big! I tried on my size 20 cords, and there were just right! Now, I am hoping that I can fit into my size 20 shorts, but they run a bit smaller than my cords. I am also going to pull out my size 18's and see how I do.
My biggest obstacle is my belly, I lose the weight, but my belly stays the same! I have found during round one, that I will lose inches every where EXCEPT my belly, then once I am of HCG, everything redistributes, with my belly becoming the sole donor to all my other areas!
I did do my measurements a couple of days ago, and found that I lost 7" overall. None in my belly/waist area, but in my shoulders, neck, thighs, chest and calves. I am now at a 40 chest, but my cup size didn't go down, which is making me more chesty. I am going to blame bad bra for this. In September, I will get some new underwear. I was going to do this a month ago, but I still can't see any loss.
This is becoming a real trust game, because I see the scale going down. I see the numbers on my tape measure getting smaller. I see my sizes shrinking, but I cannot see it in my own body. The question really becomes, how can we see our body image so far off the mark? Even in my photos, I am still 325 lbs, no matter what I weigh. At least, I understand what the anorexics are thinking and seeing.
I am going to lose all I can within the next 2 months and 3 weeks. My goal is below 200, my hope is 175, my dream is 150.
I have lost 16 lbs so far, which puts me 45 lbs from goal. I can totally do that! That will be 61 lbs total lost. From there, I can Paleo my way into the 180's and downward. If I start exercising, I will be gaining plenty of muscle, and tighten up a bit. I read about plenty of women who will try to HCG their way into the "perfect" weight. That last 10 or 15 lbs, to get them to the bottom rung of their BMI. Too many who don't change their eating habits, leaving HCG and head right over to the Pizza Hut for a large Combo and a pitcher of beer, and then wonder why they have to keep coming back to the HCG.
Maybe it's because they were never really fat? Our society is really messed up. Body image is hard enough when you are really fat (that would be 50+ pounds over norm), but for some walking, talking hanger to cry over 10 lbs makes me want to puke! 10 lbs? Really? Seriously? I don't have a whole lot of sympathy for someone being 10 lbs "overweight" when they are comparing against the lowest number on the recommended weight to height ration. Like I am to be somewhere between 125 to 182, that's a huge range! If I was crying about being 135, nobody would take me seriously either! I am 5'9" tall, I would be a swizzle stick!
Many are figuring out that the BMI scale is bogus. I still use it, 'cause I want to move from Obese to just Overweight, that would make me happy. Beyond that? I don't give a crap. I am fat now, and strong. I have pretty good endurance (not great, I am still fat..). I can lift heavy things and throw them. If I have to run, I can (I just bounce around a bunch). Could I lift a burning car off someone? Don't know, I haven't had the opportunity, but I would try (Incredible Hulk, anyone?).
Strong is the new Skinny, that's the new Paleo saying. I am not into lifting weights, and will probably not CrossFit with the rest of the Paleo community. I will be more Grok-like, and start incorporating lifting heavy things, and sprinting a bit, definitely incorporate more play. I want to hike and explore and do all the things I was embarrassed to do at 300 + lbs. I want to jet ski. I want to go to the fair or amusement park and ride the rides, without worrying whether I'll fit or not. I want to fly somewhere in an airplane, and not have to buy two seats. I want people to not ignore me, just 'cause they can't stand to talk to fat people. I may be 45 years old, but I have missed so much being fat, it's like I am 20 in the things I want to do!
That's what keeps me going. I have two small children to see grow up. They need to live life, not hide in the house, because their fat mother couldn't get out and do stuff with them.
45 pounds and counting!
The greatest part of yesterday was me putting on my size 22 jeans and finding them way too big! I tried on my size 20 cords, and there were just right! Now, I am hoping that I can fit into my size 20 shorts, but they run a bit smaller than my cords. I am also going to pull out my size 18's and see how I do.
My biggest obstacle is my belly, I lose the weight, but my belly stays the same! I have found during round one, that I will lose inches every where EXCEPT my belly, then once I am of HCG, everything redistributes, with my belly becoming the sole donor to all my other areas!
I did do my measurements a couple of days ago, and found that I lost 7" overall. None in my belly/waist area, but in my shoulders, neck, thighs, chest and calves. I am now at a 40 chest, but my cup size didn't go down, which is making me more chesty. I am going to blame bad bra for this. In September, I will get some new underwear. I was going to do this a month ago, but I still can't see any loss.
This is becoming a real trust game, because I see the scale going down. I see the numbers on my tape measure getting smaller. I see my sizes shrinking, but I cannot see it in my own body. The question really becomes, how can we see our body image so far off the mark? Even in my photos, I am still 325 lbs, no matter what I weigh. At least, I understand what the anorexics are thinking and seeing.
I am going to lose all I can within the next 2 months and 3 weeks. My goal is below 200, my hope is 175, my dream is 150.
I have lost 16 lbs so far, which puts me 45 lbs from goal. I can totally do that! That will be 61 lbs total lost. From there, I can Paleo my way into the 180's and downward. If I start exercising, I will be gaining plenty of muscle, and tighten up a bit. I read about plenty of women who will try to HCG their way into the "perfect" weight. That last 10 or 15 lbs, to get them to the bottom rung of their BMI. Too many who don't change their eating habits, leaving HCG and head right over to the Pizza Hut for a large Combo and a pitcher of beer, and then wonder why they have to keep coming back to the HCG.
Maybe it's because they were never really fat? Our society is really messed up. Body image is hard enough when you are really fat (that would be 50+ pounds over norm), but for some walking, talking hanger to cry over 10 lbs makes me want to puke! 10 lbs? Really? Seriously? I don't have a whole lot of sympathy for someone being 10 lbs "overweight" when they are comparing against the lowest number on the recommended weight to height ration. Like I am to be somewhere between 125 to 182, that's a huge range! If I was crying about being 135, nobody would take me seriously either! I am 5'9" tall, I would be a swizzle stick!
Many are figuring out that the BMI scale is bogus. I still use it, 'cause I want to move from Obese to just Overweight, that would make me happy. Beyond that? I don't give a crap. I am fat now, and strong. I have pretty good endurance (not great, I am still fat..). I can lift heavy things and throw them. If I have to run, I can (I just bounce around a bunch). Could I lift a burning car off someone? Don't know, I haven't had the opportunity, but I would try (Incredible Hulk, anyone?).
Strong is the new Skinny, that's the new Paleo saying. I am not into lifting weights, and will probably not CrossFit with the rest of the Paleo community. I will be more Grok-like, and start incorporating lifting heavy things, and sprinting a bit, definitely incorporate more play. I want to hike and explore and do all the things I was embarrassed to do at 300 + lbs. I want to jet ski. I want to go to the fair or amusement park and ride the rides, without worrying whether I'll fit or not. I want to fly somewhere in an airplane, and not have to buy two seats. I want people to not ignore me, just 'cause they can't stand to talk to fat people. I may be 45 years old, but I have missed so much being fat, it's like I am 20 in the things I want to do!
That's what keeps me going. I have two small children to see grow up. They need to live life, not hide in the house, because their fat mother couldn't get out and do stuff with them.
45 pounds and counting!
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Needing "Throne Time"
This is a TMI posting, so reader beware....
I am on VLCD 12, finally breaking a short stall (2 days), but I think my stall has more to do with a lack of "throne time". On Round one I didn't have a problem with BMs until the end of my round, but I have also been Paleo and obviously not eating enough fiber! On HCG, I tend to gorge on lettuce (romaine, not ice burg), but still, it's not enough. I have increased my magnesium intake, but it looks like a Smooth Move cup of tea is in my future (yuck!). As Ron White says, "I am going to back into a new wardrobe"!
OK, we've covered poop, what's next, ah yes, saggy skin. I still think for the most part that my skin is already a lost cause, but that doesn't stop me from flapping my arms (my bat wings), staring at the "elephant" thighs (not because they are fat, but because they are saggy), the "apron" I am gaining with my belly sagging down. Ugh! Did I mention that my boobs are a bit saggy? Like all the way down to my waist!
Turns out that the whole "you can donate loose skin to a burn center for free surgery", is an Urban Legend. Nope, you are stuck trying to find wholesale plastic surgery.
I am still not sure about prices, but boobs will be about 5 to 7k each, my bat wings will be about 5k-ish (and will probably need PT). My belly? about 10-15k and a weeks worth of recovery. My thighs? Don't know. Either way we're looking at 20 to 30k, and since we don't have that kind of money, and I don't have a marketing strategy to cash in on my weight loss and Paleo lifestyle, I guess I am SOL, at least until I come up with an idea.
I would rather be thin with saggy skin, then fat with taunt but incredibly stretched to the max skin. And, is surgery really worth it? Going under a general anesthetic is not always wise. I am losing weight to improve my health and live my life, not get thin to put my life in jeopardy!
With today's choices of Lycra and spandex, I can squeeze the whole mess in. I may have to forfeit shorts and skorts, but there's always peddle pushers (clam diggers) and "flower child" skirts. For swim wear, I am thinking of a surfer shirt and trunks, but I could always switch to board shorts. No more tanks, but I am single handily bringing back the 80's, I can wear tanks with an open Hawaiian print shirt over them, to go with my Farrah Fawcett hair!
Off to deal with the kids!
I am on VLCD 12, finally breaking a short stall (2 days), but I think my stall has more to do with a lack of "throne time". On Round one I didn't have a problem with BMs until the end of my round, but I have also been Paleo and obviously not eating enough fiber! On HCG, I tend to gorge on lettuce (romaine, not ice burg), but still, it's not enough. I have increased my magnesium intake, but it looks like a Smooth Move cup of tea is in my future (yuck!). As Ron White says, "I am going to back into a new wardrobe"!
OK, we've covered poop, what's next, ah yes, saggy skin. I still think for the most part that my skin is already a lost cause, but that doesn't stop me from flapping my arms (my bat wings), staring at the "elephant" thighs (not because they are fat, but because they are saggy), the "apron" I am gaining with my belly sagging down. Ugh! Did I mention that my boobs are a bit saggy? Like all the way down to my waist!
Turns out that the whole "you can donate loose skin to a burn center for free surgery", is an Urban Legend. Nope, you are stuck trying to find wholesale plastic surgery.
I am still not sure about prices, but boobs will be about 5 to 7k each, my bat wings will be about 5k-ish (and will probably need PT). My belly? about 10-15k and a weeks worth of recovery. My thighs? Don't know. Either way we're looking at 20 to 30k, and since we don't have that kind of money, and I don't have a marketing strategy to cash in on my weight loss and Paleo lifestyle, I guess I am SOL, at least until I come up with an idea.
I would rather be thin with saggy skin, then fat with taunt but incredibly stretched to the max skin. And, is surgery really worth it? Going under a general anesthetic is not always wise. I am losing weight to improve my health and live my life, not get thin to put my life in jeopardy!
With today's choices of Lycra and spandex, I can squeeze the whole mess in. I may have to forfeit shorts and skorts, but there's always peddle pushers (clam diggers) and "flower child" skirts. For swim wear, I am thinking of a surfer shirt and trunks, but I could always switch to board shorts. No more tanks, but I am single handily bringing back the 80's, I can wear tanks with an open Hawaiian print shirt over them, to go with my Farrah Fawcett hair!
Off to deal with the kids!
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Losing, gaining, losing again
My body is fickle! I had lost 1.4 lbs, only to gain it back the next day, now am 1.8 lbs down.
You really have to track what you eat and when you eat it. My gain could have been a number of things. Apples: I had an apple, which by the end of my Round 1, was causing gains, looks like there will be no more apples for me! Eating after 7 pm: This was when I had the offending apple. Or, possibly stress in general. We have been trying to quit smoking, and my kids plus the neighbors kids were driving me up a wall!!!!
It's funny how the little things can derail what you are doing. Eating can be a chore, until you make your ideal eating patterns a habit. There are rules within rules. With HCG, eating on protocol is easy, you get X, Y, and Z, this is really easy, since you are so limited. Then there are the peripheral rules, that you find out for yourself, like not eating late in the day. When I was doing the Leptin Reset (LRx), I would eat my BAB (big ass breakfast) and a lunch at around 2 pm, but would not eat dinner, since I wasn't hungry.
Once I finish with this round of HCG, I may do another LRx, to make sure that the reset of my hypothalamus took. I will know, if I don't feel the need to snack.
I am looking forward to a lifetime of Paleo eating. I am also looking forward to being able to exercise. I am making plans of how to live after HCG. I wish I could find a book about "The Care and Feeding of a New Skinny Body" Everyone talks about how they lose the weight, with a bit of "happily ever after" for an ending. Is it really "happily ever after"? Or, is there more to it? I am sure there is more to it. For every pound I lose, I have to be two steps ahead to keep them gone.
What is becoming increasing difficult, is getting the family on board. The Colonel is fine with plenty of meat and veggies when he can sit down and eat. Unfortunately, when he is working, he doesn't have the luxury of being able to sit and eat, because he eats while behind the wheel of his truck, going from one stop to another. He doesn't care for hard boiled eggs, which would be the perfect "go to food", also, he has a hard time with things like beef jerky, carrots, or anything else that is hard or crunchy. I do make him "sandwiches" using either leaf lettuce or almond flour biscuits. It's the side "dishes" that are hard. He likes potato chips, which, since he's an adult and can make his own decisions, I still provide. I did score a win with Lara Bars, which he really likes, but until I can figure out the recipe, I am stuck buying, but only when the Grocery Outlet has them, otherwise, they are very much out of our budget.
With the Parents moving in, our food budget has skyrocketed, because I try to provide the best food possible. Organic, Natural, et al. are all very expensive, so I have to compromise with standard issue at the grocery stores. It's better than filling the family up on grains and such, but requires a bit of creativeness on my part.
Change is hard for everyone. For me, it's learning how to eat like a normal person. For the family it's learning how to eat differently from the rest of America. That would be the America that is getting fatter and fatter, because the Nation is getting bad advice on what is healthy and what is not. Grains are not healthy, fats are healthy. Fake "heart smart" food is not healthy, meats/animal proteins are healthy. We all agree that vegetables are healthy, but the "Powers that Be" tell us to limit our "intake", which is not healthy. If you want to eat a platter of broccoli, please, dig in. Eat vegetables till you can't eat any more!
Time to start the day!
You really have to track what you eat and when you eat it. My gain could have been a number of things. Apples: I had an apple, which by the end of my Round 1, was causing gains, looks like there will be no more apples for me! Eating after 7 pm: This was when I had the offending apple. Or, possibly stress in general. We have been trying to quit smoking, and my kids plus the neighbors kids were driving me up a wall!!!!
It's funny how the little things can derail what you are doing. Eating can be a chore, until you make your ideal eating patterns a habit. There are rules within rules. With HCG, eating on protocol is easy, you get X, Y, and Z, this is really easy, since you are so limited. Then there are the peripheral rules, that you find out for yourself, like not eating late in the day. When I was doing the Leptin Reset (LRx), I would eat my BAB (big ass breakfast) and a lunch at around 2 pm, but would not eat dinner, since I wasn't hungry.
Once I finish with this round of HCG, I may do another LRx, to make sure that the reset of my hypothalamus took. I will know, if I don't feel the need to snack.
I am looking forward to a lifetime of Paleo eating. I am also looking forward to being able to exercise. I am making plans of how to live after HCG. I wish I could find a book about "The Care and Feeding of a New Skinny Body" Everyone talks about how they lose the weight, with a bit of "happily ever after" for an ending. Is it really "happily ever after"? Or, is there more to it? I am sure there is more to it. For every pound I lose, I have to be two steps ahead to keep them gone.
What is becoming increasing difficult, is getting the family on board. The Colonel is fine with plenty of meat and veggies when he can sit down and eat. Unfortunately, when he is working, he doesn't have the luxury of being able to sit and eat, because he eats while behind the wheel of his truck, going from one stop to another. He doesn't care for hard boiled eggs, which would be the perfect "go to food", also, he has a hard time with things like beef jerky, carrots, or anything else that is hard or crunchy. I do make him "sandwiches" using either leaf lettuce or almond flour biscuits. It's the side "dishes" that are hard. He likes potato chips, which, since he's an adult and can make his own decisions, I still provide. I did score a win with Lara Bars, which he really likes, but until I can figure out the recipe, I am stuck buying, but only when the Grocery Outlet has them, otherwise, they are very much out of our budget.
With the Parents moving in, our food budget has skyrocketed, because I try to provide the best food possible. Organic, Natural, et al. are all very expensive, so I have to compromise with standard issue at the grocery stores. It's better than filling the family up on grains and such, but requires a bit of creativeness on my part.
Change is hard for everyone. For me, it's learning how to eat like a normal person. For the family it's learning how to eat differently from the rest of America. That would be the America that is getting fatter and fatter, because the Nation is getting bad advice on what is healthy and what is not. Grains are not healthy, fats are healthy. Fake "heart smart" food is not healthy, meats/animal proteins are healthy. We all agree that vegetables are healthy, but the "Powers that Be" tell us to limit our "intake", which is not healthy. If you want to eat a platter of broccoli, please, dig in. Eat vegetables till you can't eat any more!
Time to start the day!
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Made it to the 40s!!!!
This is Day 6 VLC, and after a goose egg yesterday, I lost a pound this morning, which I know doesn't seem like much, but in the scheme of things, I am averaging 1.7lbs lost a day! I am down 10.6 lbs from load weight.
The 30s are just 10 short pounds away!
I know my losses won't keep at this pace, but I should lose at a more steady rate, albeit slower. Even going long, it will take at least 60 to 70 days to get down to 200, I am hoping. If not, I am planning on doing at least 3 months (90 days) which should carry me to being below 200. Anything in the hundreds will be awesome. I have seen a one in front of my weight since, well, never in adult life.
I was thrilled to get my driver's license last month, for once I put my right weight on it! Now I am more than 10 lbs lighter!
Once I stabilize at 1XX, I will go ahead and get another new driver's license, new picture, real weight!
My very first DL said 180 as my weight, but I bet I was more than 200 then. It was like reverse anorexia, I thought that I was thinner than I was. Now, even though I have lost 75+ pounds, I can't see it, at all. I am so used to being fat, that all I see is fat. I have to rely on what the scale, tape measure and clothing size tell me, 'cause when I look down, I am still HUGELY fat! Which I am, just not AS HUGE!!
The 30s are just 10 short pounds away!
I know my losses won't keep at this pace, but I should lose at a more steady rate, albeit slower. Even going long, it will take at least 60 to 70 days to get down to 200, I am hoping. If not, I am planning on doing at least 3 months (90 days) which should carry me to being below 200. Anything in the hundreds will be awesome. I have seen a one in front of my weight since, well, never in adult life.
I was thrilled to get my driver's license last month, for once I put my right weight on it! Now I am more than 10 lbs lighter!
Once I stabilize at 1XX, I will go ahead and get another new driver's license, new picture, real weight!
My very first DL said 180 as my weight, but I bet I was more than 200 then. It was like reverse anorexia, I thought that I was thinner than I was. Now, even though I have lost 75+ pounds, I can't see it, at all. I am so used to being fat, that all I see is fat. I have to rely on what the scale, tape measure and clothing size tell me, 'cause when I look down, I am still HUGELY fat! Which I am, just not AS HUGE!!
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Down some more...
I woke up to a 3.2 lb loss, yea me! It was weird to look at the scale, and think that I haven't lost anything! This is all new territory too, so to not feel excited about this is just plain ole strange. I am excited, losing weight is great, especially being able to do it so fast. In 2 days I am down 5.6 lbs! I am hoping to see the 40's in 2 or 3 more days. That will be even more exciting!
This round isn't going as fast as the last, but then again, I don't have as much to lose! Yeah, I still have a lot to lose, but 60 lbs is already gone.
Onward!
This round isn't going as fast as the last, but then again, I don't have as much to lose! Yeah, I still have a lot to lose, but 60 lbs is already gone.
Onward!
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Had a loss...
On VLCD 1 of 2.4 lbs, pretty good, not fantastic, but good in of itself. So my stats: I actually got to "see" the shaping that the Body Shaper drops talked about! Mostly had belly move up to the areas that lost the weight, and evened me out.
Here's my lastest (and worst pics):
Even after a 60 lb loss, turns out I'm still fat! OK, besides the belly, check out the bat wings! What I do notice, is that my back fat has gone down A LOT!! Hey, is that a butt? Who knew I had a butt?!!!
Well, one day down, bunches more to go! Hopefully, I will drop another 1.8 lbs tomorrow, and start fresh at my pre load weight. I am hoping to get into the 240's by weeks end (249.9 is the "40's"!). Then I will be only 40-something lbs from 200!
Happy losses to me!
Here's my lastest (and worst pics):
260.4 lbs
My husband is a great guy, but he's no Ansel Adams (more like Gomez Addams, yummy!)Even after a 60 lb loss, turns out I'm still fat! OK, besides the belly, check out the bat wings! What I do notice, is that my back fat has gone down A LOT!! Hey, is that a butt? Who knew I had a butt?!!!
Well, one day down, bunches more to go! Hopefully, I will drop another 1.8 lbs tomorrow, and start fresh at my pre load weight. I am hoping to get into the 240's by weeks end (249.9 is the "40's"!). Then I will be only 40-something lbs from 200!
Happy losses to me!
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