I am now half a pound from my first goal. It's not much (at least to those who aren't as fat as I am), but my first goal is to be under 300 lbs. I'll even take 299.9 with relish (not the pickle kind). In all theory, I have achieved this goal, because I wear my robe when I weigh (I feel stupid standing in the kitchen nekkid), and as much material that was used to make it must weigh at least half a pound, if not more!
My next goal will be to lose 10% of my original body weight (32.5). That would put me at 292.5. Then I start working for 275, 250, 225, 200.
If I can get down to 225, I will be a happy human. Since I am doing this for a full 90 day (that may change, but that's the plan right now), I will take all I can get. My losses are extraordinary!
Last night, Pookers asked for strawberries and cucumber, so I hopped online to find a salad, and there was one from Food.com. I had to alter it for protocol, but that was easy, and I could share with the whole family! Next time I serve it, I will double the recipe (since that is where my calorie fillers come in!).
Today is a skip day for me (I don't take HCG to avoid immunity), my last skip day went alright, and I don't expect any drama from it, the kids? Sure, huge amounts of drama from them!
So far this is smooth sailing. I think that I am doing well because of researching out HCG, and being on the HCG Forum. Through the Forum I have read what works for some, what doesn't work for others, and some trappings and mindsets that some people bring on themselves.
There are those who are already thin, who think they need to be thinner, but the HCG won't work for them and they feel that they are just starving, because they are. Then there are those who want to lose weight, but aren't mentally prepared for what the diet entails, and cheat and cry about their weight loss being so slow. Then, there are those, like me, who put in the work. Who have the right mindset. Who want all they can get from HCG. It's not easy. The food gets boring. Society shoves "forbidden fruit" in your face all the time. Family/friends don't understand. HCG gets bad press, usually from those who haven't done it, or those who have, but it didn't work (or they cheated all the way thru). Not everything works for everyone. Some people are just better at metabolizing what they eat. Other (like me) cannot live to eat, drink and be merry. I can be merry, but my joy can't be all about food. Having that understanding is a huge portion of my battle against the bulge. As I have said before grains, starches, sugars, all poison to me. But, what happens when I go out with the family? I have to be one of those super picky people. I can't have the pastries. I can't have one or two french fries. I can't have a piece of cake to join in on the celebration.
We were enjoying the Strawberry Cucumber Salad, and I realized that a) totally protocol and b) this is something that can be shared amongst the masses, and they wouldn't know the difference between this salad and any other. What's the difference? Made to protocol, it has virtually no calories! Which means that you could eat TONS and not gain. I am very excited, because this is something that I can serve at our 4th of July blowout! Since grilled meat is totally Paleo, and this salad is too! I am going to start planning out the menu, basing everything I serve on the Paleo diet, and see if anyone notices. There will be some things not Paleo, chips, soda, etc., but everything else will be Paleo! Totally awesome!
Showing posts with label HCG. Show all posts
Showing posts with label HCG. Show all posts
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Settling in and marching forward
Today I scored a goose egg in weight loss. Zero, in this case is good. Better to hold than to gain. Yesterday, I was down another 1.2 lbs.
There are going to be days like these. After more than 22 lbs lost, I can't really complain. I am hoping to get below 300 by tomorrow, and it can happen (calling the Whoosh Fairy!), but if it doesn't, it doesn't. That will be the end of this part, and I will move on to my next 10 days. So, I am 11 days down (counting load days) and have 79 days to go. I will keep on while I can. By the second week in May, I will go into phase 3/phase 4. I am hoping to be down 100 lbs (or better). Then I will figure if I will do a round 2.
My worry is my own body chemistry. I have a tendency to become tolerant to anything I take. Once I take something for any period of time then stop, I don't respond to it anymore (like ibuprofen). That's why I am going the long route, and hopefully, lose a large amount of weight in the NOW, as opposed to a pound here and a pound there, never achieving any goals.
As the countdown continues, I am hopeful for the best of what I can do, and what HCG has to offer. I just can't be fat anymore.
A test of my resolve will come up tonight when we go to the movies. I will take an apple with me, for just in case, but to be surrounded by popcorn munching, the intoxicating butter smells, and the nachos, red vines, M & M's, and pretzels with cheese, just makes me remember that I can't have these things. They are poison to me! And I am going to treat them and think of them as such.
Poison. Grains. Sugars. Starches. All are a fat death to me. It's a real shame that the USDA/FDA go on and on about grains being the end all be all of being healthy, but of course, they are not. How is it that the Infamous They can perpetuate such lies? When America is getting fatter and fatter, sicker and sicker, spending more and more on medical care that they wouldn't need if the Diet Dictocrats (Thanks to Sally Fallon for that) would actually be truthful.
In another month or so, I am going to the "Doctors", and I will ask for a blood test to test everything. I am very interested in seeing that my cholesterol is down, my blood pressure is down, and my numbers are so much better across the board.
I will bring my HCG journal in with me, just to prove that, as usual, the medical profession doesn't have a frickin' clue about what they are talking about. Maybe, if Doctors would worry less about funding and a big ole paycheck, and more about people's health and well being, the lies and falsehoods would stop. Doctors would actually take time to learn from nutrition up!
Even though I didn't lose any weight today, I can wrap my robe around myself, where the side pockets overlap in the front. HA. Yea for me!
There are going to be days like these. After more than 22 lbs lost, I can't really complain. I am hoping to get below 300 by tomorrow, and it can happen (calling the Whoosh Fairy!), but if it doesn't, it doesn't. That will be the end of this part, and I will move on to my next 10 days. So, I am 11 days down (counting load days) and have 79 days to go. I will keep on while I can. By the second week in May, I will go into phase 3/phase 4. I am hoping to be down 100 lbs (or better). Then I will figure if I will do a round 2.
My worry is my own body chemistry. I have a tendency to become tolerant to anything I take. Once I take something for any period of time then stop, I don't respond to it anymore (like ibuprofen). That's why I am going the long route, and hopefully, lose a large amount of weight in the NOW, as opposed to a pound here and a pound there, never achieving any goals.
As the countdown continues, I am hopeful for the best of what I can do, and what HCG has to offer. I just can't be fat anymore.
A test of my resolve will come up tonight when we go to the movies. I will take an apple with me, for just in case, but to be surrounded by popcorn munching, the intoxicating butter smells, and the nachos, red vines, M & M's, and pretzels with cheese, just makes me remember that I can't have these things. They are poison to me! And I am going to treat them and think of them as such.
Poison. Grains. Sugars. Starches. All are a fat death to me. It's a real shame that the USDA/FDA go on and on about grains being the end all be all of being healthy, but of course, they are not. How is it that the Infamous They can perpetuate such lies? When America is getting fatter and fatter, sicker and sicker, spending more and more on medical care that they wouldn't need if the Diet Dictocrats (Thanks to Sally Fallon for that) would actually be truthful.
In another month or so, I am going to the "Doctors", and I will ask for a blood test to test everything. I am very interested in seeing that my cholesterol is down, my blood pressure is down, and my numbers are so much better across the board.
I will bring my HCG journal in with me, just to prove that, as usual, the medical profession doesn't have a frickin' clue about what they are talking about. Maybe, if Doctors would worry less about funding and a big ole paycheck, and more about people's health and well being, the lies and falsehoods would stop. Doctors would actually take time to learn from nutrition up!
Even though I didn't lose any weight today, I can wrap my robe around myself, where the side pockets overlap in the front. HA. Yea for me!
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Happy Happy Joy Joy Skipping
The "Happy Happy Joy Joy" is in regards to waking up to a 2.6lb lost! Skipping is in reference to this being my "skip" day, where I don't take hcg, to avoid becoming tolerant to it.
Pretty soon, folks are going to accuse me of being a man. Actually, gender has only a bit in this, the reason I am losing so quickly is because I am so heavy. I was also very careful about my loading days, opting for lots of fatty foods rather than bready stuff.
This really proves my point that I have no business eating grain based/starchy foods. My body is too sensitive to the effects. I order some cookbooks from Amazon, Paleo and a couple of gluten free (coconut flour) books. I have done very well with having no carbs. So far, since there is a good payoff (weight loss) my attitude has been very positive. But, just to be fair (LIFE"S NOT FAIR), I haven't had a huge drama in my life either. So nothing has happened that would make me want to chuck it all and raid a McDonald's.
It takes 30 days to break a habit, and put a new habit in it's place. I have 90 days, three times as much time as is needed. And during that time, I am going to learn all about Paleo, all about gluten-free, all about what to avoid and why I am avoiding it. The toughest sell is going to be my beloved Colonel. He finds all this diet stuff to be hokey. When I said that I couldn't eat carbs anymore, he became skeptical, immediately. But, he can't argue with the facts. No carbs and I have lost 19.2 lbs. Yes, hcg helped direct my abnormal fat cells to release the fat, but it's the diet that is spurring this all on. I don't eat the carbs I am offered (Melba toast or a Grissini breadstick). I don't want them, and I don't NEED them, at all!
So, I am going to research going grain free, and find alternatives (coconut flour, almond flour) to make the goodies that the Colonel won't live without. The kids will switch and not think a thing of it, which will serve them in the future. I am not going to demonize sugar, bread, and such, but instead direct the family to learning that these things aren't necessary or even vital to live. Things that will stay, butter, cheese, and even bacon (as more of a "treat" rather than a staple). The financial investment is going to be high. I want to find cage free, non vegan, blah blah blah, eggs (high in omega 3's), the non grain flour, and grass fed beef, free range pork, and free range chickens. Fish will be added too, but finding fish from a decent fish monger here in Northern California will be quite a trick! Maybe a trip or two to San Fran will be in order to get the fresh fish, put it on ice and bring it home to freeze. I have to practice how to skin and fillet a fish, since I am new to the whole seafood thing.
Hopefully, I will remain focused today, without the assistance of hcg. I will take some B-12 around noonish (after lunch).
OH, and maybe my steamer will come in and I can have lobster or shrimp today! Yummy!
Pretty soon, folks are going to accuse me of being a man. Actually, gender has only a bit in this, the reason I am losing so quickly is because I am so heavy. I was also very careful about my loading days, opting for lots of fatty foods rather than bready stuff.
This really proves my point that I have no business eating grain based/starchy foods. My body is too sensitive to the effects. I order some cookbooks from Amazon, Paleo and a couple of gluten free (coconut flour) books. I have done very well with having no carbs. So far, since there is a good payoff (weight loss) my attitude has been very positive. But, just to be fair (LIFE"S NOT FAIR), I haven't had a huge drama in my life either. So nothing has happened that would make me want to chuck it all and raid a McDonald's.
It takes 30 days to break a habit, and put a new habit in it's place. I have 90 days, three times as much time as is needed. And during that time, I am going to learn all about Paleo, all about gluten-free, all about what to avoid and why I am avoiding it. The toughest sell is going to be my beloved Colonel. He finds all this diet stuff to be hokey. When I said that I couldn't eat carbs anymore, he became skeptical, immediately. But, he can't argue with the facts. No carbs and I have lost 19.2 lbs. Yes, hcg helped direct my abnormal fat cells to release the fat, but it's the diet that is spurring this all on. I don't eat the carbs I am offered (Melba toast or a Grissini breadstick). I don't want them, and I don't NEED them, at all!
So, I am going to research going grain free, and find alternatives (coconut flour, almond flour) to make the goodies that the Colonel won't live without. The kids will switch and not think a thing of it, which will serve them in the future. I am not going to demonize sugar, bread, and such, but instead direct the family to learning that these things aren't necessary or even vital to live. Things that will stay, butter, cheese, and even bacon (as more of a "treat" rather than a staple). The financial investment is going to be high. I want to find cage free, non vegan, blah blah blah, eggs (high in omega 3's), the non grain flour, and grass fed beef, free range pork, and free range chickens. Fish will be added too, but finding fish from a decent fish monger here in Northern California will be quite a trick! Maybe a trip or two to San Fran will be in order to get the fresh fish, put it on ice and bring it home to freeze. I have to practice how to skin and fillet a fish, since I am new to the whole seafood thing.
Hopefully, I will remain focused today, without the assistance of hcg. I will take some B-12 around noonish (after lunch).
OH, and maybe my steamer will come in and I can have lobster or shrimp today! Yummy!
Monday, February 13, 2012
Still moving forward...
...but at a slower pace. Today I was down 1.8 lbs, still awesome and fantastic! I knew this time was coming. The average for women to lose is .5 to .75 lbs a day. In a week, at .5 is equal to 3.5 lbs. Extrordinary!!! The "professionals" say 1 to 2 lbs is "healthy". I say "pfffttt..." to them. I have lost a total of 16.6 lbs so far, and that's in 5 days!
In 7 days, I will be taking a new picture, and taking measurements, and average out my weight loss, and I think everyone will be pleasantly surprized.
The best part, is learning more about what I put into my body. What has been making me fat. What my attitude is about being fat. And, changing my thinking about food.
I wish it was as easy as the snobby skinny people say, but it's not. It's real easy to be on a high horse when you can scarf all you want and not gain. Now, I am learning to find celebrations in nonfood ways. I will be working hard on the up coming holiday menus. We have birthdays coming up. Luckily for me, although I love cake, I can't stand frosting anymore. And instead of always serving pizza, I will come up with some great salads (fruit and lettuce) and we can make burgers. I need to invest in one of those "gluten free" cookbooks. In fact, the further I can get me and my family from grains, the better. Which means no corn, either. You know when you go # 2 and the corn kernels are just sitting there? Guess what? Your body has been doing everything it could to break down the corn, which is irritating the lining of your stomach and intestines, and not breaking down!
Anyway, I am hoping, at the end of the "deca week" I will have made it into the 200's (or at least darn close), and will have some of the ever popular (but always TMI) Tales from the Shower!
In 7 days, I will be taking a new picture, and taking measurements, and average out my weight loss, and I think everyone will be pleasantly surprized.
The best part, is learning more about what I put into my body. What has been making me fat. What my attitude is about being fat. And, changing my thinking about food.
I wish it was as easy as the snobby skinny people say, but it's not. It's real easy to be on a high horse when you can scarf all you want and not gain. Now, I am learning to find celebrations in nonfood ways. I will be working hard on the up coming holiday menus. We have birthdays coming up. Luckily for me, although I love cake, I can't stand frosting anymore. And instead of always serving pizza, I will come up with some great salads (fruit and lettuce) and we can make burgers. I need to invest in one of those "gluten free" cookbooks. In fact, the further I can get me and my family from grains, the better. Which means no corn, either. You know when you go # 2 and the corn kernels are just sitting there? Guess what? Your body has been doing everything it could to break down the corn, which is irritating the lining of your stomach and intestines, and not breaking down!
Anyway, I am hoping, at the end of the "deca week" I will have made it into the 200's (or at least darn close), and will have some of the ever popular (but always TMI) Tales from the Shower!
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Still losing at a great pace.
I didn't get much sleep, and was afraid that it would effect my losses, but this morning I was down another 5 lbs! That makes 14.8 lbs in 4 days (including loading days!). Now for the caveat; these losses will slow down. This is like a jump start. Within a few days my losses will slow, while my body catches up. While the losses are slowing, my fat cells which are filling up with water, will be releasing the water and shifting around, reducing my size.
My hope is that I make it into the low, single digit 300's or even manage to get into the 200's (299 is a lot, but better than 325!). I am really looking forward to losing inches too! My plan is to do some closet shopping. Right now I am wearing a 28 (52), I have some pants in a 26 (48), and some pants as low as a 40. At the end of all this, I am thinking that anything below a 36 would be heavenly! I can't even tell you what the "junior" size is. Maybe a 12 or a 14? These numbers really don't have any meaning for me, because the smallest I remember being was 36, and that was when I was about 14 yo.
I was just getting ready to write about how lucky I was 'cause I am tall and carry my weight well, poppycock! I have always been fat. A fat teen who became a fat adult, and it was only down hill from there!
What is interesting is that everything I have learned, and am learning is culminating into my new life plan. With the hcg, I can actually feel when I am really hungry, not just filling a hole. It's kinda like an alcoholics "moment of clarity". I am sure that is far too dramatic, but I have a disease. You don't get obese because of being lazy. You don't get obese because you eat. You get obese because of WHY you eat. Most people, fat and thin, will agree that doughnuts taste good. Even vegans will admit that bacon tastes good.
Everyone gets hungry. Some overweight people will starve themselves to lose a pound or two, what do they get? Someone sees them eating a salad, and makes a comment that they would lose weight if they would only put down the fork. Nice. Well, OK, so that person just might put down the fork, and pick up a spoon and start shovelling in a quart of ice cream. Happy now?
People will fall over themselves to congratulate someones sobriety. Knowing that if the sober person has one drink, they could die. People will congratulate someone for losing weight, too. Then offer a Starbucks coffee with all the fixin's (at 500 cal per cup), and a lovely muffin (800 cal), and an offer of a celebration lunch (1200-1500). All bad fats, all carbs, no food value, while the whole time the offerer and the offeree are both in a fog of "congratulations".
It's not fair. Of course, this is lesson number 1 about life. It's not fair. It's not fair that I can't eat bready stuff. It's not fair that my Mexican food days are over. It's not fair that I will turn to the refrigerator for comfort and support. Well boo hoo. You know what I can do? I can walk. Which isn't fair to someone in a wheelchair. I can hear. Which is not fair to the deaf. I can see. Which is not fair to the blind. My children are growing up in the best country in the world, they will never know hunger, cold, or hopelessness, which is not fair to children in Third World countries. So, you see, life is not fair. The bottom line. If you know that life isn't fair, don't whine about your lot in life. Instead, look to all that you have, all you can do, all that you can be. If the worst of your life is to having avoid bread and ice cream, then count all the blessing you do have in your life!
Sermon over, go in peace!
My hope is that I make it into the low, single digit 300's or even manage to get into the 200's (299 is a lot, but better than 325!). I am really looking forward to losing inches too! My plan is to do some closet shopping. Right now I am wearing a 28 (52), I have some pants in a 26 (48), and some pants as low as a 40. At the end of all this, I am thinking that anything below a 36 would be heavenly! I can't even tell you what the "junior" size is. Maybe a 12 or a 14? These numbers really don't have any meaning for me, because the smallest I remember being was 36, and that was when I was about 14 yo.
I was just getting ready to write about how lucky I was 'cause I am tall and carry my weight well, poppycock! I have always been fat. A fat teen who became a fat adult, and it was only down hill from there!
What is interesting is that everything I have learned, and am learning is culminating into my new life plan. With the hcg, I can actually feel when I am really hungry, not just filling a hole. It's kinda like an alcoholics "moment of clarity". I am sure that is far too dramatic, but I have a disease. You don't get obese because of being lazy. You don't get obese because you eat. You get obese because of WHY you eat. Most people, fat and thin, will agree that doughnuts taste good. Even vegans will admit that bacon tastes good.
Everyone gets hungry. Some overweight people will starve themselves to lose a pound or two, what do they get? Someone sees them eating a salad, and makes a comment that they would lose weight if they would only put down the fork. Nice. Well, OK, so that person just might put down the fork, and pick up a spoon and start shovelling in a quart of ice cream. Happy now?
People will fall over themselves to congratulate someones sobriety. Knowing that if the sober person has one drink, they could die. People will congratulate someone for losing weight, too. Then offer a Starbucks coffee with all the fixin's (at 500 cal per cup), and a lovely muffin (800 cal), and an offer of a celebration lunch (1200-1500). All bad fats, all carbs, no food value, while the whole time the offerer and the offeree are both in a fog of "congratulations".
It's not fair. Of course, this is lesson number 1 about life. It's not fair. It's not fair that I can't eat bready stuff. It's not fair that my Mexican food days are over. It's not fair that I will turn to the refrigerator for comfort and support. Well boo hoo. You know what I can do? I can walk. Which isn't fair to someone in a wheelchair. I can hear. Which is not fair to the deaf. I can see. Which is not fair to the blind. My children are growing up in the best country in the world, they will never know hunger, cold, or hopelessness, which is not fair to children in Third World countries. So, you see, life is not fair. The bottom line. If you know that life isn't fair, don't whine about your lot in life. Instead, look to all that you have, all you can do, all that you can be. If the worst of your life is to having avoid bread and ice cream, then count all the blessing you do have in your life!
Sermon over, go in peace!
Saturday, February 11, 2012
It's Awesome!
You just gotta love the whole hcg diet thing! Since I started 3 DAYS AGO, I have lost 9.8 pounds, any side effects? Just waking up with a dull headache both days.
My legal council (the Voices inside my head) are reminding me that this is a temporary "whoosh", and won't keep up at this pace (bummer). But even a .5 or 1 lb loss would be most welcome.
During week 1, the losses are pretty big pound wise, during week 2 is when all this fat is going to start shifting around, and I will start seeing inches disappear. Week 3 is a mixture of both pounds and inches (hence the name of Dr. Simeons' research).
I am not sure about how long I will be doing hcg for the first round. Part of me wants to go a full 90 days, but my head is telling me to get off 50 lbs, go P3 for 3 weeks, and dive back in (maybe with 3 weeks of P4).
Here's what I want: I want to be healthy. I don't want to be morbidly obese anymore. I have 2 small children to raise. I have a wonderful husband that I want to grow old with. I want to do all the wonderful things that life has to offer.
I have to look at my fat as a cancer. If I had cancer, I would do anything and everything to fight it, right? Food is my cancer. The problem is that you can cut out cancer, you can't cut out food. A huge portion of using the hcg is not just to lose weight (bonus), but to change my relationship with food. Food is NOT my friend. Food is my enemy. I can no longer live to eat, but must instead eat only to live.
As I remain on the VLCD, my body is learning to get energy from fats, and not store away abnormally, but to use the excess for energy. Once I have exhausted the abnormal fat, then my body will continue to use what I eat to be used for energy, as long as I stay away from the excesses. Carbohydrates in grain/pseudo grain form just stores away in my already stretched abnormal fat cells, so grain/pseudo grain carbs are a thing of the past. Along with refined sugars, which have no food value of any sort. Even the energy that sugar supplies is short and too much of a spike, and totally not worth it. There are plenty of ways to get an energy boost. Fruit, nuts (not legumes), veggies and proteins.
I have been really lucky, since I had cut out soda years ago, so that's a monkey that I don't carry. Prior to starting hcg, I cut down/out most carbs in my diet. In fact, the Colonel was shocked when we went to a restaurant and I ordered steak with a side of ribs, and had a double portion of veggies instead of a starch, and passed on the bread/croutons.
My last loading meal was at Hometown Buffet, and I had a huge salad with tons of dressing, beets, eggs, bacon, and for my crunch I added sunflower seeds, no croutons. Then I went to the main courses and had a plateful of really fatty pork ribs and one, count it, one roll, which I savored and said my goodbyes to.
Breads/sugars are just nails in my coffin. Mortality is very real to me. I have clogged arteries and hypertension. Why? Because I have been killing myself with a fork, a slow and steady suicide. I will be 45 in 3 months, and I want to be out of the 300's and into the solid 200's (below 250 would be most excellent). Before the year is out, I will be in the 100's. 150 is supposed to be "ideal" but I will take 175 with relish and hold it there.
It's a whole life change. All my heart and soul are in this. I need this. I don't want to have a heart attack. I don't want to have a stroke. I don't want to be fat. This goes against everything I have ever done in my whole life. A complete 180 degree turn about. I must become a whole different person. One who thinks differently, one who acts differently, one who reacts differently. A total transformation.
My legal council (the Voices inside my head) are reminding me that this is a temporary "whoosh", and won't keep up at this pace (bummer). But even a .5 or 1 lb loss would be most welcome.
During week 1, the losses are pretty big pound wise, during week 2 is when all this fat is going to start shifting around, and I will start seeing inches disappear. Week 3 is a mixture of both pounds and inches (hence the name of Dr. Simeons' research).
I am not sure about how long I will be doing hcg for the first round. Part of me wants to go a full 90 days, but my head is telling me to get off 50 lbs, go P3 for 3 weeks, and dive back in (maybe with 3 weeks of P4).
Here's what I want: I want to be healthy. I don't want to be morbidly obese anymore. I have 2 small children to raise. I have a wonderful husband that I want to grow old with. I want to do all the wonderful things that life has to offer.
I have to look at my fat as a cancer. If I had cancer, I would do anything and everything to fight it, right? Food is my cancer. The problem is that you can cut out cancer, you can't cut out food. A huge portion of using the hcg is not just to lose weight (bonus), but to change my relationship with food. Food is NOT my friend. Food is my enemy. I can no longer live to eat, but must instead eat only to live.
As I remain on the VLCD, my body is learning to get energy from fats, and not store away abnormally, but to use the excess for energy. Once I have exhausted the abnormal fat, then my body will continue to use what I eat to be used for energy, as long as I stay away from the excesses. Carbohydrates in grain/pseudo grain form just stores away in my already stretched abnormal fat cells, so grain/pseudo grain carbs are a thing of the past. Along with refined sugars, which have no food value of any sort. Even the energy that sugar supplies is short and too much of a spike, and totally not worth it. There are plenty of ways to get an energy boost. Fruit, nuts (not legumes), veggies and proteins.
I have been really lucky, since I had cut out soda years ago, so that's a monkey that I don't carry. Prior to starting hcg, I cut down/out most carbs in my diet. In fact, the Colonel was shocked when we went to a restaurant and I ordered steak with a side of ribs, and had a double portion of veggies instead of a starch, and passed on the bread/croutons.
My last loading meal was at Hometown Buffet, and I had a huge salad with tons of dressing, beets, eggs, bacon, and for my crunch I added sunflower seeds, no croutons. Then I went to the main courses and had a plateful of really fatty pork ribs and one, count it, one roll, which I savored and said my goodbyes to.
Breads/sugars are just nails in my coffin. Mortality is very real to me. I have clogged arteries and hypertension. Why? Because I have been killing myself with a fork, a slow and steady suicide. I will be 45 in 3 months, and I want to be out of the 300's and into the solid 200's (below 250 would be most excellent). Before the year is out, I will be in the 100's. 150 is supposed to be "ideal" but I will take 175 with relish and hold it there.
It's a whole life change. All my heart and soul are in this. I need this. I don't want to have a heart attack. I don't want to have a stroke. I don't want to be fat. This goes against everything I have ever done in my whole life. A complete 180 degree turn about. I must become a whole different person. One who thinks differently, one who acts differently, one who reacts differently. A total transformation.
Friday, February 10, 2012
So It Begins
I received my hcg drops from Body Shaper on the 7th, and started "loading" on the 8th and 9th. Loading is when you eat and eat (going for high fat content), then, when you think you couldn't eat another bite, you eat some more.
There is a weird psychological thing going on, 'cause when you have Carte Blanc to scarf like a pig, you suddenly find that you aren't hungry. It's not only weird, but stupid too!
I said my goodbyes to many favorites. Not just for the duration of my diet, but also for life. I will be using this time to learn about Paleo eating (Caveman diet). Lots of fruits and veggies, lots of meat, no grains, little or no dairy. Cheese will probably stay in our diet, along with butter. Milk is really neither here or there with us. We can switch to coconut milk, and the kids will be just as happy. Except for those horrid flavor straws, the kids don't drink milk anyway.
So today beings my hcg VLCD (very low calorie diet) which should max out at about 500 cals. It's going to be hard, but looking at the big picture, I can't stay fat. I have put alot into this. $325 alone in hcg. Then extras (new scale, digital food scale, $300 in meat/veggies), then there is the mental preparation. I have lived for this time.
Is there a pay off? Sure, this morning, after eating and eating, I woke up to a 4 pound weight loss. Yes, four pounds. After eating everything that wasn't nailed down. In 2 days, I lost 4 pounds. The Medical community says a pound a week is "healthy". No, a pound a week is slow. A pound of weight loss from the Medical community is a pound of necessary fat, not abnormal fat. My 4 pound loss is abnormal fat. That's what hcg does, it attacks abnormal fat. We need the fat in our bodies. Fat protects our internal organs. There is a fat patch under your heels, otherwise, you would be walking on a bone (ouch!). Structural fat. Then there is your storage fat, that with people like me, can't be released with regular dieting. Wait, it can be released, but only after you have gotten rid of your structural fat, and started breaking down muscles. Because the storage fat is for the lean famine times (of which most of us in the US will never see), the human body will do everything it can to hang on to it, including eating it's own muscles to keep that storage fat as full as possible.
Because we (as a society) consume extraordinary amounts of grain based carbohydrates and refined sugars, the body cannot use the excess, and stores it away. When was the last time you couldn't go to the grocery and "hunt" down a wild loaf of bread?
After the flood, other than what was stored on the ark, there were no grains to be had. This was when man had to start eating animals (even possibly before that, Adam may have hunted, but this is for the Creationists to argue over). Other than being on the Ark, the animals were afraid of man. They weren't going to stand still. The hunt was on.
Anyway, long story short (too late), while I am learning to eat better, I will simultaneously start teaching the family to start eating better too.
So, here's what hcg is going to do for me. HCG is going to help me release the abnormal fat stored in my fat cells (we are born with X number of fat cells, and they fill up with stored fat), the hcg encourages the body to use this stored up fat for energy, rather than relying on carbohydrates to provide energy by eating. The fat cells will release the fat, and be replaced (in the beginning) with water, then the water will be released. I only have a rudimentary understanding on how the process works. But, it does work.
For those who think they should lose 5 or 10 lbs, it may not work. Just because you have a poochy tummy, doesn't mean you are storing extra (abnormal) fat. Fat storage is normal. Being obese, is NOT NORMAL. So, for those who are seeking that Kate Moss waif look, you must look elsewhere (try anorexia, or some sort of concentration camp). I would hope that most adults would realize that being supermodel, stick figure thin, is unhealthy, and not sexy. Any man who would want a woman like that is sick in the head. Any woman who would do that to herself to get a man, is suicidal.
I am lucky, my Colonel is a "chubby chaser", that's how I landed him. But, truthfully, he understands that all this extra weight is putting a strain on me. I have been diagnosed with hypertension (high blood pressure), and although it's not being treated with medicine, my arteries are starting to clog with high cholesterol. Too thin or too fat, both are suicide by fork (not enough fork, or too much fork). Both are also very slow and painful. Painful to live, and painful to watch.
Oh, in case you didn't know, the reason those "super models" are so thin, is because they are living human wire hangers, to show how the clothes drape. It is also the reason they have such a sour look on their faces (that mean look), so you won't look at their face, but at the clothes instead. Is this really something to strive for? Seriously, a human, sour faced hanger?
So, as the blog title says, this is the beginning. My diet day will look like this:
Wake up, pee, weigh.
Take hcg, holding for 5 mins under my tongue.
30 minutes after that, drink coffee, tea, and the ever present water.
Have lunch (100 g fish, chicken, lean beef and veggies, radishes, lettuce, Swiss chard, beet greens, tomato, onion, cucumber, asparagus. Maybe one piece of fruit, strawberries, handful, 1/2 grapefruit, apple or orange. One piece of Melba toast or grissini bread stick is also allowed, but I don't really want the carbs).
Wait 30 minutes, take hcg.
Wait another 30 minutes, continue with water (at least 2 litres a day), coffee, tea.
Dinner, repeat lunch with different meat and veg.
Wait 30 minutes, take hcg.
Wait another 30 minutes, drink more water.
Not exciting by any means, except when I wake up in the morning and found that I have lost another 1/2 a pound to a pound.
The first week is usually big losses (I lost 4 pounds in 2 day, AWESOME). The second week the body is recouping, so although weight loss slows down (and sometimes stalls), inches will start coming off. The third week everything evens out, for the most part, (mostly....).
There will be big loss days, small loss days, and no loss days. A huge part of losing weight is your mindset. I know that I am my worst enemy. I will beat myself up with food. Bad day, eat. Started having a good day, then the kids made me mad, eat. Someone looks at me wrong, eat. The sun came up, eat. Do you see the pattern? Yeah, me too. Except, because I am, in essence, trying to kill myself, I didn't care. My pal food will make me feel better, right? Here's the vicious cycle. Food seems to make me feel better, then I feel worse about all the eating, so I eat more to feel better. This isn't just me. This is all the fat (obese) people. We all have different reasons for turning to food in the first place, but the cycle is the same for all of us.
Remember all this, because Rusty is good, Rusty is wise. And getting thinner everyday!
There is a weird psychological thing going on, 'cause when you have Carte Blanc to scarf like a pig, you suddenly find that you aren't hungry. It's not only weird, but stupid too!
I said my goodbyes to many favorites. Not just for the duration of my diet, but also for life. I will be using this time to learn about Paleo eating (Caveman diet). Lots of fruits and veggies, lots of meat, no grains, little or no dairy. Cheese will probably stay in our diet, along with butter. Milk is really neither here or there with us. We can switch to coconut milk, and the kids will be just as happy. Except for those horrid flavor straws, the kids don't drink milk anyway.
So today beings my hcg VLCD (very low calorie diet) which should max out at about 500 cals. It's going to be hard, but looking at the big picture, I can't stay fat. I have put alot into this. $325 alone in hcg. Then extras (new scale, digital food scale, $300 in meat/veggies), then there is the mental preparation. I have lived for this time.
Is there a pay off? Sure, this morning, after eating and eating, I woke up to a 4 pound weight loss. Yes, four pounds. After eating everything that wasn't nailed down. In 2 days, I lost 4 pounds. The Medical community says a pound a week is "healthy". No, a pound a week is slow. A pound of weight loss from the Medical community is a pound of necessary fat, not abnormal fat. My 4 pound loss is abnormal fat. That's what hcg does, it attacks abnormal fat. We need the fat in our bodies. Fat protects our internal organs. There is a fat patch under your heels, otherwise, you would be walking on a bone (ouch!). Structural fat. Then there is your storage fat, that with people like me, can't be released with regular dieting. Wait, it can be released, but only after you have gotten rid of your structural fat, and started breaking down muscles. Because the storage fat is for the lean famine times (of which most of us in the US will never see), the human body will do everything it can to hang on to it, including eating it's own muscles to keep that storage fat as full as possible.
Because we (as a society) consume extraordinary amounts of grain based carbohydrates and refined sugars, the body cannot use the excess, and stores it away. When was the last time you couldn't go to the grocery and "hunt" down a wild loaf of bread?
After the flood, other than what was stored on the ark, there were no grains to be had. This was when man had to start eating animals (even possibly before that, Adam may have hunted, but this is for the Creationists to argue over). Other than being on the Ark, the animals were afraid of man. They weren't going to stand still. The hunt was on.
Anyway, long story short (too late), while I am learning to eat better, I will simultaneously start teaching the family to start eating better too.
So, here's what hcg is going to do for me. HCG is going to help me release the abnormal fat stored in my fat cells (we are born with X number of fat cells, and they fill up with stored fat), the hcg encourages the body to use this stored up fat for energy, rather than relying on carbohydrates to provide energy by eating. The fat cells will release the fat, and be replaced (in the beginning) with water, then the water will be released. I only have a rudimentary understanding on how the process works. But, it does work.
For those who think they should lose 5 or 10 lbs, it may not work. Just because you have a poochy tummy, doesn't mean you are storing extra (abnormal) fat. Fat storage is normal. Being obese, is NOT NORMAL. So, for those who are seeking that Kate Moss waif look, you must look elsewhere (try anorexia, or some sort of concentration camp). I would hope that most adults would realize that being supermodel, stick figure thin, is unhealthy, and not sexy. Any man who would want a woman like that is sick in the head. Any woman who would do that to herself to get a man, is suicidal.
I am lucky, my Colonel is a "chubby chaser", that's how I landed him. But, truthfully, he understands that all this extra weight is putting a strain on me. I have been diagnosed with hypertension (high blood pressure), and although it's not being treated with medicine, my arteries are starting to clog with high cholesterol. Too thin or too fat, both are suicide by fork (not enough fork, or too much fork). Both are also very slow and painful. Painful to live, and painful to watch.
Oh, in case you didn't know, the reason those "super models" are so thin, is because they are living human wire hangers, to show how the clothes drape. It is also the reason they have such a sour look on their faces (that mean look), so you won't look at their face, but at the clothes instead. Is this really something to strive for? Seriously, a human, sour faced hanger?
So, as the blog title says, this is the beginning. My diet day will look like this:
Wake up, pee, weigh.
Take hcg, holding for 5 mins under my tongue.
30 minutes after that, drink coffee, tea, and the ever present water.
Have lunch (100 g fish, chicken, lean beef and veggies, radishes, lettuce, Swiss chard, beet greens, tomato, onion, cucumber, asparagus. Maybe one piece of fruit, strawberries, handful, 1/2 grapefruit, apple or orange. One piece of Melba toast or grissini bread stick is also allowed, but I don't really want the carbs).
Wait 30 minutes, take hcg.
Wait another 30 minutes, continue with water (at least 2 litres a day), coffee, tea.
Dinner, repeat lunch with different meat and veg.
Wait 30 minutes, take hcg.
Wait another 30 minutes, drink more water.
Not exciting by any means, except when I wake up in the morning and found that I have lost another 1/2 a pound to a pound.
The first week is usually big losses (I lost 4 pounds in 2 day, AWESOME). The second week the body is recouping, so although weight loss slows down (and sometimes stalls), inches will start coming off. The third week everything evens out, for the most part, (mostly....).
There will be big loss days, small loss days, and no loss days. A huge part of losing weight is your mindset. I know that I am my worst enemy. I will beat myself up with food. Bad day, eat. Started having a good day, then the kids made me mad, eat. Someone looks at me wrong, eat. The sun came up, eat. Do you see the pattern? Yeah, me too. Except, because I am, in essence, trying to kill myself, I didn't care. My pal food will make me feel better, right? Here's the vicious cycle. Food seems to make me feel better, then I feel worse about all the eating, so I eat more to feel better. This isn't just me. This is all the fat (obese) people. We all have different reasons for turning to food in the first place, but the cycle is the same for all of us.
Remember all this, because Rusty is good, Rusty is wise. And getting thinner everyday!
Monday, January 16, 2012
I have a plan (or gee, isn't it time to get your, uh... "life" together?)
Me? With a plan? Yes, me, with a plan.
I am at the end of my very fat rope. I can't stay this way.
Maybe I am grasping straws, but this feels like it's the last thing I can do. I am going to do HCG. It's a pregnancy hormone that, when used with a very low calorie diet (VLCD @500cals), helps to burn off the abnormal fat (See Pounds and Inches by Dr. Simeon's), instead of the healthy fat that the body needs, but will be burned off first when using low cal/exercise program.
My launch date is still in limbo, mainly because I am waiting for the $$$ and still have to order the HCG. But, probably be the second week of February 2012.
I am gearing up mentally right now. Thinking about all the places I am going to go to to do my two "load" days (load- eat as much fatty food that you can get down without throwing up, then eating some more! A total bonus score for the calorically challenged!). Then, I am planning 40 days (+/-) of VLCD. There are only certain foods that can be eaten. 100g of meat (chicken, beef, veal, non oily fish, shrimp, lobster, crab) twice a day, and certain vegetables (leafy lettuces, spinach, chard, beet greens, cucumbers, tomato, onions) twice a day. No sugar. Very limited carbs (2 Melba toast or 2 grisini bread sticks). At least 1/2 gal water (gallon is better) and all coffee and tea you can choke down (no sweetener). For a allowed sweetener, I will be getting some Stevia in the Raw.
So, I will be doing the VLCD for 40-ish days, then 21 days in Phase 3, where you start adding more calories but no carbs or sugar, yes to healthy fats. This is a time to "stabilize", stay within 2 pounds of my last drop weight (ldw). And, then on to Phase 4 to maintain, for 21 days. Then, it's back to the beginning to start the whole thing all over again!
I am hoping for a 40 lb drop in my first round and 30 ish lb drop in R2 and then a 30 lb drop in R3. If I can get to 200 lbs, I will be a happy human. It's going to take a better part of a year to do this, but I would like to see a Christmas where I am not a big fat cow of a woman. That would be the best gift of all!
I am in this for the long haul. Again, I can't go on and on being fat, using excuse after excuse to stay fat. I want to live life. Right now my life is nothing more than living to eat. I use food for comfort, love, boredom, loneliness, and just because I can't think of anything better to do. I have a life time of bad habits to change. All on me, no excuses.
I have really come to terms with my problem. I am an addict, not food as a whole, but sugar and carbs. Breads are my downfall. Bread, doughnuts, cakes, cookies, tortillas, toast, French Toast, pancakes (which I don't really like unless they are drowning in butter, egg, and syrup). I am actively bidding bye bye to these foods. Soon, I will have Rob Wolf's book The Paleo Diet in my hot, little hands, and possibly the Primal Blueprint, and I will learn all I need to know about "caveman" eating, or, as I like to call it, just off the Ark eating. It's taking a "hunter/gatherer" approach to eating. Noah and his family didn't hop off the Ark and head over to the Qwik Mart for bread, milk and cheese! There were plants and animals to eat, in the beginning. No bread, at first, 'cause there probably wasn't any grain ready to harvest and grind.
Our society didn't start getting fat until after industrialization and then in the 50's, after WWII, to make a "woman's life easier". TV dinners, processed milk, margarine, hot dogs, soy products (which were used as a casing for mortars during the war), Twinkies, boxed cereal, processed, processed, processed. Which started making America fatter, and fatter, and fatter. We have even forgotten that there was a time when people ate bacon, eggs, ham, butter, raw milk, avocado, lard, steak, chicken skins, bacon grease, and were HEALTHY. Vegetarians were few and far between, but they ate eggs, cheese, milk and honey. Now we have Vegans, who only eat grass, lettuce and all things processed. They are sickly. Only through the miracle of modern medicine do these people, and all us fat people stay alive. Try to find a doctor that knows anything about nutrition. Heck, try a find a nutritionist who knows anything beyond what the Pharmaceutical companies tell them. More processed, fake foods, and more pills. All this equals more profit.
Knowledge is power. Ignorance is no longer bliss, it can kill you, or at least leave you sick and stupid, and fodder for the medical community to experiment on. Not a good place to be.
I will be posting my journey with HCG. What I am doing, eating, and losing (or "releasing" as the hcg folks like to say). This is going to be a fun ride!
I am at the end of my very fat rope. I can't stay this way.
Maybe I am grasping straws, but this feels like it's the last thing I can do. I am going to do HCG. It's a pregnancy hormone that, when used with a very low calorie diet (VLCD @500cals), helps to burn off the abnormal fat (See Pounds and Inches by Dr. Simeon's), instead of the healthy fat that the body needs, but will be burned off first when using low cal/exercise program.
My launch date is still in limbo, mainly because I am waiting for the $$$ and still have to order the HCG. But, probably be the second week of February 2012.
I am gearing up mentally right now. Thinking about all the places I am going to go to to do my two "load" days (load- eat as much fatty food that you can get down without throwing up, then eating some more! A total bonus score for the calorically challenged!). Then, I am planning 40 days (+/-) of VLCD. There are only certain foods that can be eaten. 100g of meat (chicken, beef, veal, non oily fish, shrimp, lobster, crab) twice a day, and certain vegetables (leafy lettuces, spinach, chard, beet greens, cucumbers, tomato, onions) twice a day. No sugar. Very limited carbs (2 Melba toast or 2 grisini bread sticks). At least 1/2 gal water (gallon is better) and all coffee and tea you can choke down (no sweetener). For a allowed sweetener, I will be getting some Stevia in the Raw.
So, I will be doing the VLCD for 40-ish days, then 21 days in Phase 3, where you start adding more calories but no carbs or sugar, yes to healthy fats. This is a time to "stabilize", stay within 2 pounds of my last drop weight (ldw). And, then on to Phase 4 to maintain, for 21 days. Then, it's back to the beginning to start the whole thing all over again!
I am hoping for a 40 lb drop in my first round and 30 ish lb drop in R2 and then a 30 lb drop in R3. If I can get to 200 lbs, I will be a happy human. It's going to take a better part of a year to do this, but I would like to see a Christmas where I am not a big fat cow of a woman. That would be the best gift of all!
I am in this for the long haul. Again, I can't go on and on being fat, using excuse after excuse to stay fat. I want to live life. Right now my life is nothing more than living to eat. I use food for comfort, love, boredom, loneliness, and just because I can't think of anything better to do. I have a life time of bad habits to change. All on me, no excuses.
I have really come to terms with my problem. I am an addict, not food as a whole, but sugar and carbs. Breads are my downfall. Bread, doughnuts, cakes, cookies, tortillas, toast, French Toast, pancakes (which I don't really like unless they are drowning in butter, egg, and syrup). I am actively bidding bye bye to these foods. Soon, I will have Rob Wolf's book The Paleo Diet in my hot, little hands, and possibly the Primal Blueprint, and I will learn all I need to know about "caveman" eating, or, as I like to call it, just off the Ark eating. It's taking a "hunter/gatherer" approach to eating. Noah and his family didn't hop off the Ark and head over to the Qwik Mart for bread, milk and cheese! There were plants and animals to eat, in the beginning. No bread, at first, 'cause there probably wasn't any grain ready to harvest and grind.
Our society didn't start getting fat until after industrialization and then in the 50's, after WWII, to make a "woman's life easier". TV dinners, processed milk, margarine, hot dogs, soy products (which were used as a casing for mortars during the war), Twinkies, boxed cereal, processed, processed, processed. Which started making America fatter, and fatter, and fatter. We have even forgotten that there was a time when people ate bacon, eggs, ham, butter, raw milk, avocado, lard, steak, chicken skins, bacon grease, and were HEALTHY. Vegetarians were few and far between, but they ate eggs, cheese, milk and honey. Now we have Vegans, who only eat grass, lettuce and all things processed. They are sickly. Only through the miracle of modern medicine do these people, and all us fat people stay alive. Try to find a doctor that knows anything about nutrition. Heck, try a find a nutritionist who knows anything beyond what the Pharmaceutical companies tell them. More processed, fake foods, and more pills. All this equals more profit.
Knowledge is power. Ignorance is no longer bliss, it can kill you, or at least leave you sick and stupid, and fodder for the medical community to experiment on. Not a good place to be.
I will be posting my journey with HCG. What I am doing, eating, and losing (or "releasing" as the hcg folks like to say). This is going to be a fun ride!
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